When I read scripture and there are things that I question about, did this really happen? Did that really happen? I don't necessarily feel like something that's false just because I don't understand it. I may not be able to understand how it happened, but the question is, do I believe? Do I believe that it is possible? You've got to say, you know, God, I'm going to start even if it doesn't look perfect. And now there's a journey because I can show, look, y'all,

this is where I started. And now I've gradually gotten better. So don't be afraid to start with what

you have and where you are. What's up, family? This is your girl, SJR, and you are listening to

The Woman Evolve podcast. I am recording this on Monday, July 7, and yesterday was a big day, probably one of, you know,

the biggest days in my life as my husband and I were installed as the senior pastors of the Potter's House Dallas.

And I think that making the announcement for us becoming the senior pastors was more emotional than the installation, but the installation was heavier than I think I anticipated.

Mind you, I'm coming off of a long weekend, but I woke up this morning and I felt a heaviness.

I felt a heaviness yesterday too.

But not like a, not a grief, though I do think there were elements of grief in just that this wasn't necessarily

my plan. Sometimes when God's plan for your life reveals itself, no matter how majestic

it is, it still requires that you grieve what you thought your plan was going to be

while also celebrating God's plan. And I feel like it's a disservice to not acknowledge that.

And there is a responsibility connected to this that I take very seriously. And as a result of taking it very

seriously, I feel the weight of that. I grew up in this household, this, you know, Jake's family

household. And I've seen so many aspiring pastors and ministers who felt like this was the final destination.

Like if our ministry arrives to this point, then we'll be successful.

And I think because I saw all of the behind the scenes of the physical cost, the emotional,

spiritual cause, the relational cause, that I just wanted to see

something different initially for my life. It wasn't until we came to Dallas the last few years

that I think I really begin to recognize the harvest connected to the cost and i think in recognizing the harvest connected to the cost

that you know i have surrendered and told god if you make this clear i'll i'll say yes i'll go

wherever you want me to go and so I have been feeling that heaviness.

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