I've got about 10 seconds to tell you about how you can get two-for-one tickets for top-draw comedy nights near you thanks to our friends at the TV channel, Dave, at absolute radio.comadio. Also, I've got to tell you about how you can win a five-night trip to the New York Comedy Festival while you're there, too. But I've run out of time.

You're listening to Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. Well, you know, at the Bullring Shopping Centre, there's smile on every face and the moment that you enter, you find it's a friendly place. There's a bit of goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, famous outdoor market. Come by bus or come by car. There's a place where you can park it. If only Morton Harket had been in the news, but it's before his time. Oh, sorry. There probably isn't a place where you can park the car now. It's probably overwhelmed. Well, someone will probably mind your car, but that's another story. Yeah, you can park your car, but it'll be upside down and unfail when you come out the market.

But it costs you as well. Do you remember people never paid for parking? I always had the theme to answer the last of the summer wine on my bank of dingles, but I don't. You could park anywhere too. You used to drive to King's Road and leave your car there. My mate's dad used to park on some waste ground at the back of Dewsbury swimming baths. I didn't know anyone who had a car, I'll be honest with you. Frank, when he first came to London, this is honestly true, isn't it, Frank? He didn't know that you could actually drive into London. I thought it was pedestrianised. So he parked at... I parked in Collindale? Because it was like the end of the tube line. Can we start the podcast soon?

Well people don't want to hear about our parking reminiscences.

We have pressed record, haven't we?

Unfortunately we have.

I was quite enjoying that.

Let's take a breath.

Hello! And welcome to the not the midweek podcast

I'm Frank Skinner

I am with Alan Cochran

It's a bit tardy this morning

The Cockrell

Still half asleep

And I'm with

Emily Dean I'm still half asleep. And I'm with Emily Dine.

I'm not my name.

Oh, my, that doesn't work.

Well, Emily Dia.

I need nearly.

Emily.

I need to get a proper theme tune.

...