Forgiveness, Freedom, and the Myth of “Forgive and Forget”

Voxology

Religion & Spirituality, Philosophy, Society & Culture

4.7 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 14 October 2016

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

How forgiveness transforms, heals, and awakens us to the radical grace of Jesus—even when reconciliation seems impossible. In this milestone 50th episode, Mike and Andy reflect on the podcast’s evolution, exciting upcoming changes, and dive into one of the most nuanced and powerful teachings of Jesus: forgiveness.

Whether you’ve been wounded by the church, suffered spiritual trauma, or wrestled with resentment, this conversation offers a deeply honest look at what forgiveness is—and what it isn’t. Through personal stories, unpacked theology, and quotes from RT Kendall’s “Total Forgiveness,” Mike and Andy examine why forgiveness isn't about glossing over pain or forgetting offenses, but about yielding our right to vengeance and finding healing through honest confrontation and grace.

Key Takeaways:
• Forgiveness is personal, not institutional – You can’t forgive "the church" as a vague entity; real forgiveness requires naming the individuals who caused harm.
• Dispelling the “forgive and forget” myth – True forgiveness does not require forgetting; it requires remembering rightly and responding with grace and boundaries.
• Forgiveness ≠ Reconciliation – Forgiveness can happen without reconciliation, especially when the other party is unsafe, unavailable, or unwilling to participate.
• The spiritual roots of bitterness – Holding on to resentment impacts not just our relationships but our connection to God and self.
• Practical pathways to forgiveness – From praying for God’s blessing over the one who hurt you to small internal shifts like saying their name without anger, forgiveness is often a quiet, powerful process.
• Forgiving God and Self – Wrestling with our own anger toward God or ourselves is part of learning to trust and release, even when answers never come.

Guest Highlights:
None this episode—but keep an ear out for Episode 51, featuring Joey Svensson from Bad Christian and The Pastor With No Answers podcasts.

Resources Mentioned:
• RT Kendall – “Total Forgiveness”
• Matthew 18 – Jesus' parable of the unmerciful servant
• The Lord’s Prayer – Matthew 6:12
• Subversive Kingdom Archive – formerly subversivekingdom.com (now forwarding to the new Vox website!)

This episode also includes some big announcements:
• The podcast is officially transitioning away from SubversiveKingdom.com to VoxPodcast.com.
• You can now listen via SoundCloud and subscribe directly through RSS.
• Support options and recurring contributions are coming soon—stay tuned!

Join the global Vox family in embodying Jesus’ subversive grace. If this conversation sparked something in you—or you have your own story of forgiveness—reach out. We’d love to hear from you.

Subscribe, leave a review, and follow @voxologypodcast on social to continue the journey.

—

Email feedback or questions to [email protected]
Subscribe via iTunes or Spotify
Subscribe directly on SoundCloud
Visit the new website: voxpodcast.com
And check out Vox Community teaching podcast at voxoc.com

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Support on Patreon

Music by Timothy John Stafford
Instagram & Twitter: @GoneTimothy

Grace and peace to you—see you soon for Season 2!

As always, we encourage and would love discussion as we pursue. Feel free to email in questions to [email protected], and to engage the conversation on Facebook and Instagram.

We're on YouTube (if you're into that kinda thing): VOXOLOGY TV.

Our Merch Store! ETSY

Learn more about the Voxology Podcast

Subscribe on iTunes or Spotify

Support the Voxology Podcast on Patreon

The Voxology Spotify channel can be found here: Voxology Radio

Follow Mike on Twitter: www.twitter.com/mikeerre

Music in this episode by Timothy John Stafford

Instagram & Twitter: @GoneTimothy

Transcript

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0:00.0	All right everybody, hello,
0:18.0	Hello Internet, hello World Wide Web. Mike and Andy here and from the
0:24.1	Vox World Headquarters Briya California we are so delighted you've tuned in to us
0:29.7	this is episode 50 so this has been a year we took two weeks off around the holidays
0:36.5	we'll do that again I like 50 I like 50 in a year, 50 episodes. That's solid. Yeah, it's a solid number.
0:42.2	And so, so congratulations to us. They told us when we started, we'd never last. They told us it would never work.
0:49.0	No matter how many churches and people have barred you, they said. They said, no. So, um, so we're, we're going to, we have a lot of changes coming up to, to, uh, the
0:59.4	organization of the podcast and on our one year anniversary.
1:03.6	Before we get to those, however, just a brief comment on Andy's wardrobe today.
1:07.3	He is, uh, sporting, yep, a duck whistle.
1:13.7	A, that's what that was, hopefully. Go ahead.
1:23.3	Yep, that bright orange, Mighty Ducks jersey, and Mighty Ducks hat, and to which I, you know,
1:28.4	obviously Andy knew there would be some commentary when he comes strolling in with that. And he said,
1:36.5	oh, I'm wearing it because we won our first preseason game last night. So signs you may have a problem. Signs you may have some sort of dysfunction in your relationship with a sport. You know,
1:44.1	nothing says awesome like preseason hockey.
1:46.4	Let me just say that.
1:47.4	So, Andy here is celebrating the Ducks first win in preseason.
1:53.2	And so congratulations.
1:55.3	Thank you.
1:55.7	It's hockey.
1:56.3	Thank you.
1:57.2	Thank you.
	...

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