Today I'll be talking to Routou and Avikar. Both were born in the United States to Indian immigrant

parents. They have two daughters, aged 11 and 9, and a six-year-old son. Both are comfortable

with the idea of letting the children learn from making mistakes in their schoolwork,

but what about the lessons of making mistakes in their social lives? If Routou is as strict as

her parents were, will her children rebel the way she did if she isn't? Will they go astray?

During this conversation we'll talk about what gets lost when you have to sneak out of the house

to attend the junior prom and what's gained by falling into the water right at the start of a fishing

trip. Talking with Routou and Avikar reminded me of how very many languages have single precise

words for every sort of romantic crush, and that the Norwegian word at the Pukeskop has precisely

the same meaning as the Yiddish term rebe guilt. First a disclaimer, what you are about to listen to

is not a professional counseling session. Each episode is a one-time conversation and the advice I

offered does not constitute psychological treatment or services substitute for professional

diagnosis intervention or behavioral health care. In order to protect their privacy, our guests

have been given pseudonyms and some personal details have been changed. If you have concerns about

your child's well-being or your own, seek out guidance from a medical or mental health professional,

good places to start, your child's pediatrician, the counseling staff at your child's school,

and the American Psychological Association's Comprehensive Guide to Finding Resources in your

State. And now, onto the fun.

Tell me what I can help you with today. So we have three great kids and we are raising them in a

culture and a world that we didn't get raised in. I'd like you to describe the difference.

The culture you were raised in possibly tie in the culture your parents were raised in,

and the culture you see your children in now.

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