Good evening, sweet and friendly listeners. You are listening to the QAnon Anonymous podcast,

and this is your British correspondent, Annie Kelly speaking. It is with a heavy heart

as an Englishwoman that I must break this news. Our press out of respect for a morning nation

has tried to keep this under wraps from the continent for fear that EU militia might take advantage

of the situation and invade. So it must fall to me in service of the facts and logic to tell you this.

The Royal Family has all died. The Queen, Prince Charles, Prince William, the other ones,

all gone. Your first thought may be that this horrific tragedy was a result of the global pandemic.

The truth is only more tragic. The Royal Family succumbed to a little known illness called

Morgalons, a disease which mysteriously only affects those who can trace their ancestry back to

the signing of the Magna Carta. Who then will the British people turn to to rule over them?

At a time when we have never needed a ruler more. Well, it just so happens that one member of

the Royal Family has been spared this dreadful fate. You may remember him from previous QAnon

Anonymous Dispatches and one fateful interview. That's right. Prince Andrew, the eighth and

line to the throne, has mysteriously survived the dreadful disease. Nobody is quite sure how this

remarkable feat has been achieved, or if it is related to his famed inability to sweat. But one

thing is clear. God has chosen him to preside over these fair Isles, now and forevermore.

As a member of the foreign press for this esteemed podcast, I have been allowed exclusive access

to the coronation. Quarantine restrictions are still in place, of course. So this is not the rich

and splendour-filled ceremony of old, taking place in one of the monokees more modest palaces.

The mood is solemn. Myself and other members of the press are in the special sealed-off journalist

cube, so as to avoid any contamination of the various public officials and aristocrats in attendance.

While we wait for the king to be to arrive, perhaps I can give you a quick update on how things

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