There is hope for us yet.

I am Laura McCowen.

And I am Holly Whitaker.

And this is Home Podcast.

And so it would begin.

Here, girl.

Hey. I know this. I've got butterflies in my stomach. I've had them. Yeah, me too, for two weeks.

This is new. I don't think I've had them until like the last.

I came home from, I got off my,

I got home on Friday because this is Sunday and then I took a taxi cab home and

got in bed and was like so looking forward to taking a nap and then I just was like oh my God and it's kind of been that way

since nothing's making it go away.

Well you felt like that nerve you felt a nervous feeling when you were here

but you knew what why I think this you feel like you don't know why. Oh no this is

that was like a heart feeling that was like a heart stuff this is stomach stuff this

is gut like nerves just like something you know when I was I think when I was

going to bed when I at your place I was yeah it was because I had just watched like Lennon gave this

Facebook cast and all the sudden I had that sense of cold fear and I hadn't had it in a long time but that sense of

it's not even groundlessness it's just that that thought of who are we kidding or what are we

doing or who's in charge or you know what I mean like just a sense of being cast out into a bottomless pit or

something like that and I just had a yeah I just had it.

Yeah.

...