Episode 551: Dr. Laurie Santos: How Modern Life Hijacks Your Happiness And Why Going Analog Fixes It

Habits and Hustle

Jen Cohen

Entrepreneurship, Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Business

4.5 • 818 Ratings

🗓️ 5 May 2026

⏱️ 89 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Have you noticed how the more we're connected by the internet and have all these gadgets, the lonelier we get? The things we thought would bring us together are actually making us more isolated than ever. That is the conversation I had with Dr. Laurie Santos. She is a Yale professor, an expert on happiness, and the woman behind Psychology and the Good Life, the most popular class Yale has ever offered. She also hosts her own hit podcast, The Happiness Lab, focused on the science of feeling good. In this episode, Dr. Laurie breaks down why English-speaking countries are quietly getting unhappier, why manifesting the reward actually makes you less likely to chase it, and why the expert on gratitude herself doesn't love gratitude journaling. She explains the neuroscience of wanting versus liking, why self-care has quietly become self-indulgence, and the mindset shifts that matter more than any routine, supplement, or practice on the internet. She also gets into why doomscrolling is stealing more from you than your time, the two parts of happiness you actually need both of, and the simple habits the research supports when every trendy protocol around you does not. If you have been doing everything you are supposed to do and still feel off, this episode might confirm something you’ve known about yourself and your happiness for a long time. What's Discussed: (01:30) How Dr. Laurie ended up at Yale teaching the most popular class in the school's history. (04:15) Why happiness is a skill you practice, not a personality trait you are born with. (07:40) The two kinds of happiness most people confuse and why you need both. (11:05) Why money past a certain number stops making you any happier. (14:30) The science behind why paraplegics and lottery winners end up at the same happiness baseline. (18:20) Why comparison is the single biggest thief of happiness in modern life. (22:10) Why the silver medalist looks more miserable than the bronze medalist. (26:45) Why non-English speakers are happier according to studies. (31:20) The dopamine trap of social media and why you crave what you don't even like. (35:50) Why your phone is the Nutrasweet of real connection. (40:15) Why boredom is the skill modern kids are losing and why it matters. (44:30) The shock study that reveals how uncomfortable we have become with our own thoughts. (49:10) Why the gratitude expert herself doesn't vibe with gratitude journaling. (52:40) Dr. Laurie's alternative to gratitude that actually sticks. (57:05) Why self-compassion beats self-criticism for every single goal you have. (1:01:30) Why self-care is not a bubble bath and what it actually looks like. (1:06:15) The research that shows manifestation is making you less likely to get what you want. (1:10:40) The WOOP framework and why it is the version of manifesting that actually works. (1:15:20) Why work-life balance is the wrong goal and what to aim for instead. (1:19:45) What Dr. Laurie tells her students to do in just ten minutes a day to feel happier. Thank You to Our Sponsors!AirDoctor: Head to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code HUSTLE to get up to $300 OFF today! AirDoctor comes with a 30-day money back guarantee, plus a 3-year warranty (an $84 value) FREE! Kion: Visit getkion.com/habits or 20% OFF Momentous: Ready to try supplements that actually do what they claim? Head to livemomentous.com and use code JEN for 35% OFF your first subscription. Therasage: Visit Therasage.com and use code JEN to get 15% OFF your order. Your skin deserves this level of care. Magic Mind: Head over to www.magicmind.com/jen and use code JEN at checkout. Prolon: Prolon is offering listeners 30% OFF sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Program! Just visit https://prolonlife.com/JENNIFERCOHEN and use the code JENNIFERCOHEN to claim your discount and your bonus gift. Rho Nutrition: Go to RhoNutrition.com and try Rho's Liposomal Glutathione. Use code JEN20 for 20% OFF sitewide. Manna Vitality: Try it now by using the code Jennifer20 at mannavitality.com. Find more from Jen Cohen: Website: www.jennifercohen.comInstagram: @therealjencohenBooks: www.jennifercohen.com/books Speaking: www.jennifercohen.com/speaking-engagements Find more from Dr. Laurie Santos: Website:www.drlauriesantos.com/Instagram: @lauriesantosofficial Facebook: Dr. Laurie Santos YouTube: @DrLaurieSantosTiktok: @drlauriesantosThreads: @lauriesantosofficialX: @lauriesantos Podcast: The Happiness Lab

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi guys, it's Tony Robbins. You're listening to Habits and Hustle. Crush it.
0:06.0	All right, you guys, welcome to Habits and Hustle. We have a very good guest today. This is one that I really feel we all need badly right now. Her name is Dr. Lori Santos. She is an expert in the science of happiness. And what's extremely impressive is she has the most
0:23.7	sought after, most popular class of all time at Yale University. And it's called psychology
0:30.7	and the good life. Correct? That's right. Yeah. Wow. I cannot, I've been like waiting for you to be
0:36.2	on this show. So thank you for being here.
0:38.7	Yay. I'm glad it finally worked out. I mean, yes, me too. I don't even know where to begin.
0:42.9	I know I was telling you earlier that I have like a whole plethora of questions that I write and then I never end up asking the questions.
0:50.0	But what I really love about you and I was saying this a little bit earlier is that everything that you actually talk about is not just, you know, just opinion or just, you know, randomness.
1:01.4	Everything is very science-backed. So for people who are listening and you're like, oh, whatever, it's her opinion, no, it's not. Everything is very science-backed. And there are strategies, actually, for being happy. It's not everything is very science backed and there are strategies actually for being happy it's
1:13.9	not just something that's sometimes innate yeah so would you say that being happy is a skill
1:19.7	definitely i think it's a skill and it's something that you have to practice right i mean it makes
1:25.3	you know as a fitness influencer so you know this right it's like you can know you need to do, but unless you actually get out to the gym and do that stuff, nothing is going to change. Absolutely. And this is exactly the way our mental health works, right? There are things that we know we need to do to feel a little bit better, but unless you actually get out and you practice that and you build your skills up,
1:46.1	you're not going to end up feeling any better.
1:52.3	So do you think that, I mean, in your, you know, not think, but in your research and all your findings, I've always, I always thought that we all have a baseline for happiness, right?
1:58.2	And then we can like, maybe like, we can kind of like tweak it a little bit
2:01.3	up and down. But what do, what's your belief in that? Yeah. Well, what some of the studies show is that there is part of our happiness that seems to be kind of built in. This is what researchers call it being heritable, right? Some of the differences we see across people out there in the world in terms of how happy they are, they're just based on like something about their biology, right?
2:19.3	Okay.
2:19.9	And we know this because if you look at identical twins, their happiness levels tend to be a
2:24.3	little bit more similar than like regular siblings who aren't perfectly genetically related.
2:28.6	Right.
2:29.0	But if you look at how much happiness is heritable, it's kind of a small amount.
2:33.7	So it's about the same amount
	...

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