Episode 48 - Estrangement
This Jungian Life Podcast
Joseph Lee, Deborah Stewart, Lisa Marchiano
4.7 • 2.1K Ratings
🗓️ 28 February 2019
⏱️ 65 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Estrangement from members of one’s family and others takes place far more often than seems commonly acknowledged. Estrangement involves psychologically cutting-off, repressing, and defending against connection with another who has come to be experienced as “all bad.” People may move away geographically, refuse to talk to a certain person, or simply give someone the “cold shoulder.” Joseph, Lisa and Deb discuss the importance of setting appropriate boundaries with others and understanding that estrangement is also an internal phenomenon.
The Dream:
I see a middle-aged man fixing a fence. The dogs that are in the yard with him are behaved -- they are not trying to go through the big opening in the fence. Then the man is inside a house fixing the trim on a wooden doorway. I "know" him -- and I ask, "Will you treat me?" There is a deep feeling of acceptance and he says, "We will start tomorrow." I go off to get ready for tomorrow.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to this Jungian life. |
| 0:03.0 | Three good friends and Jungian analysts, Lisa Marciano, Deborah Stewart and Joseph Lee, |
| 0:09.0 | invite you to join them for an intimate and honest conversation that brings a psychological perspective to important issues of the day. |
| 0:17.0 | I'm Lisa Marciano and I'm a youngian analyst in Philadelphia. |
| 0:22.0 | I'm Joseph Lee and I'm a youngian analyst in Philadelphia. I'm Joseph Lee and I'm a youngian analyst in Virginia Beach, Virginia. |
| 0:27.0 | I'm Deborah Stewart, a youngian analyst on Cape Cod. |
| 0:31.0 | Today Joseph and Lisa and I are going to talk about |
| 0:35.6 | estrangement which as you can tell from the word relates to stranger but in |
| 0:41.6 | particular estrangement from family. |
| 0:45.0 | As we grow up, as some of it may be developmental, |
| 0:49.4 | sometimes there are conflicts or rifts |
| 0:52.3 | that result in family members feeling really estranged. |
| 0:56.0 | It can happen between children and parents or between siblings, cousins, aunts andcles, and their nieces and nephews, and so it goes. |
| 1:07.4 | So with all that as a kind of a jumping off point, what do you think, Joseph and Lisa, about this big topic, very human. |
| 1:16.8 | Yeah, this is something that certainly comes up a lot in my practice and I have some |
| 1:22.4 | feelings about it actually. Maybe I'll just start with that because |
| 1:27.5 | you know it's pretty frequent that someone enters analysis with real problems with maybe family of origin and a question as to what we might need to do about that. |
| 1:42.0 | And I find that it often is helpful, |
| 1:45.8 | especially, you know, kind of first half of life, |
| 1:48.3 | young adults, to consider when there's a real struggle with let's say parents. |
| 1:55.0 | Sometimes it can be helpful to have a kind of very conscious, carefully |
| 2:01.0 | orchestrated temporary break and I'll often help people negotiate this. |
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