4.9 • 941 Ratings
🗓️ 15 October 2025
⏱️ 92 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
MARRIAGE & MONEY SUMMIT: https://fg.live
In this episode, Ustadh Abdul Ahad returns to continue our running series on character and manners: from the classical roots of “heedlessness of the righteous” to the modern problem of backbiting, when to ignore and when to forbid evil, how to deal with elders and youngsters, what ghayrah really means (and what it doesn’t), and why even gifts can become a burden if you’re not wise.
What you’ll learn
👉 The original hadith-scholars’ meaning of “heedlessness of the righteous” and how the term evolved
👉 A framework for ignoring vs. intervening: balancing preventing evil with protecting hearts
👉 Backbiting vs. narrating events for reconciliation (and why “I’d say it to his face” doesn’t make it halal)
👉 Building thicker skin the right way: social intelligence and tailoring your delivery to people
👉 Adab with elders: don’t sit before them, don’t walk ahead of them, lower your voice
👉 Mercy and playfulness with children; overlooking the small stuff
👉 Ghayrah as protective jealousy for all of Allah’s limits—not just over one’s spouse
👉 When ‘urf (custom) matters and when texts take precedence
👉 Gifting etiquette: how to increase love without burdening your brother or guest
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| 0:00.0 | Hickma |
| 0:01.0 | Who was given he umuette, |
| 0:03.0 | so he's given hikima? |
| 0:06.0 | Wisdom, he's given something great. |
| 0:09.0 | I don't want someone to mention my wife's name. |
| 0:12.0 | Why? What's the reason? |
| 0:14.0 | Shesh, I've been back by you for this time. |
| 0:16.0 | I've said this about you, I've said that about you for many, many years. |
| 0:19.0 | And I want you to forgive me. The Shah said, no, I don't forgive you. |
| 0:22.6 | The message of Allah said, exchange gifts. |
| 0:26.6 | Oh, exchange. |
| 0:27.6 | If you do this, the love will increase between one another. |
| 0:31.6 | Even then you should jump in. |
| 0:34.6 | Okay. |
| 0:35.6 | This concept of forbidden evil is a very big topic. |
| 0:38.6 | I'll be a bit like, yo. |
| 0:40.4 | Why, why? |
| 0:41.0 | I guess I don't know. |
| 0:42.0 | I was just like, I feel so private. |
| 0:43.8 | Why? |
| 0:45.4 | Sadly, sadly, sadly, sadly, sadly, |
| 0:47.8 | the majority of the people who have Gaira over their wives, |
... |
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