Hey, Brian, did I ever tell you the way it was back in the old days?

Yes.

Literally every time we speak, every single time we speak.

You know, back in the early days of crotch maintenance, it was rough.

I mean, yet you had to literally take a straight razor and a pair of pinking shears to your

crotch in order to avoid the summer swamp rot.

But now, with the modern technology that we have and the finest personal grooming products

that have ever been made courtesy of man scaped, you can take care of swamp rot and not spill

a drop of blood.

Folks, I'm talking about the lawnmower 3.0.

It's rechargeable.

It's waterproof.

It's got its own LED flashlight at the top of it.

So you can see every dark crevice, Nick and cranny.

You've also got the shears 2.0 nail kit, the perfect add on to the lawnmower 3.0.

So you can keep your nails trimmed.

You've got formulations that are vegan, cruelty free, die free, sulfate free.

You know, ladies and gentlemen, you know that whether it's a blow pop or an all day sucker,

it's in good hands with man scape because after all who wants hair on their lollipops.

Folks, they've got the crop reviver ball toner, the foot, dust or foot, deodorant, you will

smell and look so good.

Feel like a New Orleans whorehouse and look slicker than come on a gold tooth and you

...