Episode 325: They Helped Me Find Love—Now They're Interviewing Me About It! With Alyssa Dineen and Jennie Young
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast
Kate Anthony
4.4 • 573 Ratings
🗓️ 29 May 2025
⏱️ 61 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode is a fun twist. Alyssa Dineen of Style My Profile and Jennie Young of Burned Haystack Dating Method are back, but this time they're interviewing me. I'm in the hot seat as we dive into how their work completely shifted my experience re-entering the dating world, what I did differently this time, and how I met my partner, Ethan.
I was done with dating. D.O.N.E. I was perfectly content on my own, independent and fulfilled. But I'm also human. I wanted love, connection, and partnership. What I wasn't willing to do was settle for anything less than something truly extraordinary. This conversation is a behind-the-scenes look at what changed and what becomes possible when you lead with intention, use the right tools, and hold out for the real thing.
Here's what else we discuss in this episode:
- Why I felt stuck in a dating loop for eight years and what finally shifted after interviewing and then working with Alyssa and Jennie (9:10)
- How intentional profile choices and using the Burned Haystack Method changed everything on the apps (11:51)
- Matching with my "needle": Ethan's profile stood out with pink shorts, shared values, and genuine communication. And let's not forget those EYES!! (30:23)
- What it's been like to break all the so-called rules and build something secure, drama-free, and full of intention after years of doing the work (52:07)
Learn more about Alyssa Dineen: With over 25 years of experience as a fashion editor, stylist, and art director, Alyssa established herself as a seasoned leader in the New York fashion world. In the past decade, Alyssa has also emerged as a pioneering figure in the online dating space. Her innovative approach combines her expertise in styling with her insights into dating, guiding clients on everything from personal presentation to effective communication with potential partners.
As an acclaimed dating expert, Alyssa has been featured in The New York Times, Today Show, Goop, and Oprah Daily. She is also the author of The Art of Online Dating published by Harper Collins in 2021, which offers valuable strategies for success in online dating. You can find more information about Alyssa and Style My Profile's services at stylemyprofilenyc.com.
Learn more about Jennie Young: Jennie Young is the creator of Burned Haystack Dating Method, a dating method grounded in applied rhetoric and feminist praxis. It is designed to combat many of the challenges of dating in a market that is too frequently mediated by misogynistic and patriarchal structures. She holds a Ph.D. in rhetoric and discourse studies from Case Western Reserve University and a satire writing certificate from Second City Chicago. Her work has been published in McSweeney's, Ms. Magazine, HuffPost, and others and covered by major media outlets such as The New York Times, Newsweek, RollingStone, and others.
Resources & Links:
Thank you to today's podcast sponsor: Wild Pastures
Submit your questions here for possible inclusion in future Q&A podcast episodes
Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate
Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective
Kate's Dating Profile (video)
Blog post about deal breakers vs preferences
Episode 309: Online Dating After Divorce with Alyssa Dineen
Style My Profile website
Alyssa on Instagram
Alyssa's Facebook Group
Episode 317: Burned Haystack Dating Method with Jennie Young
Jennie's website
Jennie's Facebook Group
Jennie on Instagram
===================
DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | And I want to say to my listeners in particular that Ethan and I broke, quote, broke all the rules, right? |
| 0:07.4 | Like things have been, you know, unfolding very quickly. |
| 0:11.1 | And we are, some might say, like, it seems like we're on like a freight train, right? |
| 0:15.4 | And in a sense, we are. |
| 0:17.1 | And I am 54, he's 52. |
| 0:20.1 | We've both been through a lot in our lives to get us to a plan, a lot of therapy and a lot of |
| 0:24.5 | coaching and a lot of processes to get us to where we are in our lives. |
| 0:29.3 | There is a bit of like when you know the rules well enough, you're allowed to break them. |
| 0:34.8 | I actually have a rule about this in the haystack because we know I love |
| 0:38.4 | to make rules. Every single time, someone would say, well, they've only been together three months. |
| 0:44.1 | How do we know he's a needle? And my response to that is, you can definitely know if someone's a needle |
| 0:51.0 | after, I mean, probably less time than three months. Now, could it turn out that, |
| 0:55.5 | you know, he wasn't her needle two years down the road? Maybe. So time doesn't really mean anything |
| 1:02.3 | within the context of burned haystack. Welcome to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, where we have open and honest conversations |
| 1:15.6 | about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go. |
| 1:23.5 | I'm Kate Anthony, your divorce survival guide, and I'm here to help you navigate some of the |
| 1:29.3 | roughest waters you've ever swum in and answer some of your toughest questions. |
| 1:34.3 | I've been to hell and back, and now it's my mission in life to help you get to the other side of this process |
| 1:41.3 | with your sanity and your heart intact. |
| 1:50.7 | Hey everyone, welcome back. |
| 1:53.7 | This is a plot twist. |
| 1:56.8 | Today I am being interviewed for the show by Alyssa Deneen of Style My Profile and Jenny Young, a burned haystack dating method. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Kate Anthony, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Kate Anthony and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.