Episode 31: Peace-Keeping, Anger Avoidance, and How to Start Using Your Voice

The Best of You

That Sounds Fun Network

Health & Fitness, Mental Health

5 • 710 Ratings

🗓️ 1 December 2022

⏱️ 62 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You want to keep the peace at all costs. The problem is sometimes anger is warranted. Sometimes conflict is needed. What do you do when everything in you does not want to be the one to speak up? On today’s episode, I am joined by my dear friend Rowena Day. This is a powerful conversation for anyone who has struggled with conflict, avoided anger, or stayed quiet to get along. The second half of this episode is a WHOLE WORD. Listen in for deep wisdom on how to come out of that protective peacekeeping shell and start using your voice. Do not miss the end, when Rowena describes what she’s learning about finding her voice from parenting 4 young children. And check out the shownotes on my website where we have listed all of the amazing books, videos, music, and devotionals mentioned in this episode! Here’s what we touch on: 1. Why it’s normal to talk to yourself and how to pay attention to that inner dialogue 2. The power of attunement—and why interrupting and fixing each other doesn’t work 3. Why we learn to mute our voices 4. The power of generational messages 5. Why we push anger aside, especially as women 6. Why it’s important for peacekeepers to make friends with anger 7. Rowena’s experience of speaking up about toxic behavior she was witnessing 8. Blame shifting and scapegoating in faith communities 9. Embracing the wildness of your soul 10. The double bind culture puts women in when it comes to using your voice 11. What we can learn from our children Thanks to our sponsors: Organifi —Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today! Download Abide Sleep and Pray Meditation and text my promo code BESTOFYOU to 22433 today to get 25% off! Get your print, ebook, or audio copy of The Best of You anywhere books are sold. Find a list of resources and the full transcript for this episode here. Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	It's hard to believe December is finally upon us, and if you're anything like me, those seasonal cravings get even harder when it's darker, even earlier.
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0:54.8	Go to www.organify.com backslash Best of You and use code Best of You for 20% off your order.
1:03.6	That's O-R-G-A-N-I-F-I-com backslash Best of You and use code best of you for 20% off any item.
1:17.1	Hey everyone, I'm Dr. Allison, and I'm so glad you're here to discover what brings out the
1:22.9	best of you. This podcast is all about breaking free from painful patterns, mending the past, and discovering
1:29.9	our true selves in God. I can't wait to get started as we learn together how to become the
1:35.4	best version of who we are with God's help.
1:41.0	Hey, everyone, and welcome back to the Best of You podcast. I am grinning from ear to ear because I have a dear friend on the show with me today. Her name is Rowena. She goes by Roe. She is a friend that I met, I want to say 10 years ago, which feels crazy because it does not seem like
2:03.1	that long, at a spiritual listening community that we were both a part of. We're going to get
2:08.2	into that and talk more about that today. We've stayed in touch. She is that rare blend where we
2:14.0	just connect on the deep and we connect on the light and we find the same things funny,
2:19.9	which is such a rare, rare gift in a friend. We can go from 20,000 leagues under the sea to laughing
	...

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