When I was a teenager, I was friends with this girl, and she was one of my closest friends, and we hung out all the time and just really enjoyed each other's company and I secretly had a crush on

her but I didn't know how to tell her so I just kept it inside I was afraid that if I

told her how I really felt and she didn't feel the same way then maybe we wouldn't

even be able to be friends so So I just kept it inside.

And one day I was driving through Wanamaker, Indiana, and I drove past her house,

and I went ahead and turned around and came back, and I pulled up in her driveway.

And I got out, and I walked up to the front door and knocked on it.

And I stood there for a while, and nobody answered.

But I heard something in the backyard, so I walked around the back of the house and had this really big pasture, big field,

and she was sitting on top of a horse, and she didn't see me. But the sun was sitting behind her,

and there was a little breeze, and it was blowing her long blonde hair. I just stood there and stared at

her and I just couldn't believe how beautiful she was. So as I stood there just speechless trying to

think of something to say, I realized she was reaching into her back pocket and she pulled out a package

of something and she reached in with her right hand, and she pulled out a really

big wad of chewing tobacco and stuck it in her mouth. And it was at that very moment that I realized

that I didn't love her anymore.

Yeah. Hi, Francis. Hi friends, this is Otis Gibbs, and you're listening to Thanks for Giving a Dam.

I'm sitting here in my living room in East Nashville, Tennessee, and I have my cat Frankie on my lap,

and he's just purring away. You might be able to hear him in the background.

This is a personal journal.

This is a bit of an experiment.

And I like to say right up front that I have the slightest idea what I'm doing,

...