EPISODE 203: Is This Cheating? Part 2

Pillow Talks

Vanessa & Xander Marin

Health & Fitness, Sexuality

4.8 • 2.2K Ratings

🗓️ 10 April 2025

⏱️ 66 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Is it cheating if you go to sex club… but just to watch? What about a flirty Snapchat streak with your ex? A prostate massage with no orgasm? 👀 This week, we’re back with Part 2 of one of our most talked-about episodes. We asked our community to share the moments, confessions, and curveballs that made them ask, “Wait…is this cheating?” And let’s just say… the gray areas are graying HARD. Here’s what we’re dishing on in this episode: Is emotional intimacy outside your relationship OK? When fantasies, DMs, or even Reddit lurking crosses the line. Are AI-generated nudes of your partner’s family the point of no return? Why intention and secrecy matter more than the act itself. The emotional toll “nothing happened” takes on a relationship. The difference between curiosity and disrespect when exploring sexually. No matter how you define cheating, one thing’s clear: these kinds of conversations are hard, and they don’t get easier without the right tools. Join the Deeper membership Want hotter sex, deeper convos, and fewer fights? For less than the cost of a date night, get on-demand access to our expert-led courses, live sessions with us, and interactive tools designed to fit into your busy life. Start your journey inside Deeper here. Links & Resources 🔥 The Art Of Initiation 🤖 Meet Vanessa AI (included with Deeper membership) Stay Connected 📩 Join our email list — vmtherapy.com/subscribe 📲 Follow us on Instagram — @vanessaandxander for behind-the-scenes fun, Q&As, and more tips on love and intimacy. 🎧 Subscribe & Review — New episodes drop every Thursday! Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review — it helps us keep creating content you love. ================================= THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ================================= 👏Thanks Dipsea. Right now, listeners of this show can get a 30-day free trial ➡︎ https://dipseastories.com/pillow 👏Thanks Hungryroot. Get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life ➡︎ https://hungryroot.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Get an exclusive discount for up to 40% off ➡︎ https://cozyearth.com/pillowtalks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Okay, so here we go, Xander. Does this count as cheating?
0:04.0	My partner took pictures of my friends and family off of social media and used AI software to make nudes of their photos.
0:15.0	I'm curious about going to a sex club, not to have an experience myself there or meet anyone, but just
0:20.8	to observe and understand what the vibe is.
0:23.2	It's something I want to experience by myself, but is it cheating to not tell my partner
0:27.3	before I go?
0:28.5	He was searching the internet to see if he could find girls he personally knew from his past
0:34.1	on only fans or similar sites.
0:37.0	He said he liked the draw of knowing the naked girl on the screen.
0:41.8	Hmm.
0:42.2	Okay.
0:43.0	Suspicious.
0:48.3	Hello and welcome to the Pillow Talks podcast.
0:54.1	We're your host, Vanessa, and Zander Marin.
0:56.0	I'm a sex therapist with over 20 years of experience.
0:59.0	And I'm just a regular dude.
1:01.0	We share the ups and downs in our relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours.
1:07.0	Make sure you subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice,
1:13.6	hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors, and so much more.
1:19.8	It's the sex education you wish you'd had.
1:24.5	We are back today with round two of Is This Cheating.
1:29.7	We did round one a little while ago, and we got so much response from that that we knew we had to come back with a part two.
	...

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