Episode 186: Codependence versus Interdependence with Vanessa Bennett, LMFT
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast
Kate Anthony
4.4 • 574 Ratings
🗓️ 22 September 2022
⏱️ 44 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
I'm often asked, "What does a healthy relationship even look like?" Vanessa Bennett, LMFT, author, holistic psychotherapist, and codependency expert, joins me for a conversation that addresses that question. Plus, we discuss her new book, which she co-authored with her partner, John Kim (AKA: The Angry Therapist), "It's Not Me, It's You: Break the Blame Cycle. Relationship Better." The book covers the top ten issues couples struggle with and how they can work through them. We also discuss codependence versus interdependence, love languages, and more.
Vanessa's therapeutic approach integrates years of study and practice in Depth, Buddhist, and Yoga Psychology. She co-hosts the Cheaper Than Therapy Podcast, leads soul-based retreats and workshops, and creates and facilitates curriculum for non-profit and corporate events and conferences.
Show Highlights
- Halt the blame: codependency is universal and systemic (10:05)
- Interdependence: what it is and its role in relationships (12:21)
- Taking away the shame around our codependent ways of relating (15:34)
- Love languages are like Cliff's Notes for our needs (23:01)
- Moving towards interdependence and healing unhealthy codependency (28:02)
- When you break the blame cycle and own your shit, shifts in your relationships will happen (33:48)
Learn more about Vanessa:
After over a decade of grinding in the New York City corporate world, Vanessa Bennett realized her work, her relationships, and honestly, her life felt…off. She didn't see it at first, but her path was finding her — and the journey she started to help herself ended up being her path to helping others.
Cue the montage of her moving across the country, having a few breakdowns, heartbreaks, setbacks, taking hundreds of hours of training and workshops in yoga, yoga therapy, nutrition, somatic therapy, and reading lots and lots of books. Oh yeah, all while becoming a licensed therapist.
It turns out that this passion paired well with her unique background in telling stories through marketing and corporate strategy, a longtime practice of meditation and yoga, and the fact that she's a New Yorker who cuts to the point.
Today, Vanessa lives in Los Angeles and puts all of this to work as an Author, Licensed Holistic Psychotherapist, clinical entrepreneur, and mental health content creator. She co-hosts the Cheaper Than Therapy Podcast, leads soul-based retreats and workshops, and creates and facilitates curricula for non-profit and corporate events and conferences.
Resources & Links:
Information and links may also be found at: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/codependence-versus-interdependence-with-vanessa-bennett-lmft
Grit and Grace Group Coaching is Open - Join us!
Vanessa's website
Vanessa on Instagram
Vanessa on TikTok
TODAY'S EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY:
THE DIVORCE SURVIVAL PROGRAM
As one of the pioneers of the divorce coaching industry, I've been helping women (most of whom are moms) navigate the divorce process for the last decade.
AND NOW, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, ALL OF MY DIVORCE WISDOM IS AVAILABLE IN ONE ONLINE PROGRAM.
This program is 100% for you if…
- You're a mom looking for a clear roadmap to a divorce that won't destroy your kids
- You're looking for answers and a roadmap
- You understand that divorce is a long game
- You're willing to put away your boxing gloves
- You want this to be a respectful and collaborative process in service of your kids
- You understand that divorce is, first and foremost, an emotional process and you're ready to 'go there'
Are you ready to learn from one of the world's top divorce experts and set yourself on the path towards the best possible outcome?
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, where we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go. |
| 0:17.8 | I'm Kate Anthony, your divorce survival guide, and I'm here to help you navigate some of |
| 0:23.3 | the roughest waters you've ever swum in and answer some of your toughest questions. I've been to |
| 0:29.1 | hell and back, and now it's my mission in life to help you get to the other side of this process |
| 0:35.1 | with your sanity and your heart intact. |
| 0:44.4 | Hey, everyone. Welcome back. I'm really excited about today's show. We'll get to that in one second. |
| 0:57.5 | But first, I want to tell you that we had our very first grit and grace group coaching call last week. And it was amazing. Seriously, y'all, |
| 1:09.0 | amazing. You know, sometimes you create these things and I know what I'm going to do and I, you know, create the program, but it really comes to life when you get a group of women together, sharing authentically and honestly and holding space for each other. And it was so fucking gorgeous. You know, we still have a couple of spots |
| 1:30.0 | in this cohort. And if more people want to join, then I will open up another cohort because I want |
| 1:40.1 | to keep them, you know, intimate. I don't want to overload it. So, but I would be very happy to open up a second one if we get, you know, more people |
| 1:50.4 | want to join. |
| 1:51.3 | So it is open. |
| 1:53.0 | It is ready to go. |
| 1:55.2 | Like I said, I think I've said before, but it is like rolling entry, I guess. |
| 2:01.3 | So, you know, it's not like it starts on one day and it ends on another day. |
| 2:05.2 | Like, it is going to be ongoing so people can join it any time. |
| 2:08.2 | So if you are ready to create profound shifts in your own worth, your strength, and your power, |
| 2:21.6 | then grit and grace is 100% for you. |
| 2:28.6 | And if you want to do this learning in this beautiful space created when women come together in community, so powerful. So if you want to learn more about the program or sign up for a consultation, |
| 2:38.3 | go to kateanthony.com slash coaching and you can read all about it. And now to today's episode. |
| 2:49.0 | Today I am speaking with Vanessa Bennett. Vanessa is a licensed marriage and family |
| 2:54.5 | therapist. She is an author, holistic psychotherapist, and a codependency expert. Her therapeutic |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Kate Anthony, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Kate Anthony and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.