Blue Babies Pink, Episode 17, on Choosing to be Gay.

When you're young and same sex attracted, everything about it is confusing.

For me, one particular matter of confusion played out like this.

Gay people choose to be gay.

I'm not choosing to be gay, but for some weird reason, I'm having gay thoughts.

Way back when, sometime when I was a kid, I just thought being gay was like any other sin forbidden in the Bible.

I assumed people elected to be gay, signed up to be gay, or more simply chose to be gay.

I assumed every gay man at some point in adolescence said to himself,

hmm, should I date girls or guys, decisions, decisions? I think I'll be different and go, guys, hooray!

Order his rainbow flag off Amazon.

I really thought people chose to be gay, so imagine my surprise and terror when I began to be

drawn to guys instead of girls. But I wasn't choosing it, so this situation did not compute.

I think I was like a lot of people in that I wanted it to be a choice.

If gay is a choice, I thought then it makes the Christian theology of it so much simpler.

Religion is hard because it requires faith.

It's mysterious and at times inscrutable.

Faith is the bridge that gets us through the uncertainty, but it's tough to hang with

faith sometimes. Because of this, people of faith love the parts of it that are certain and

agreed upon by everyone. I know I do. For example, consider these sins. Stealing, murder, adultery, lying.

Most sane people agree religious or not that these things are wrong and are not good for people or society at large and the thing about all these sins is that their behaviors and behaviors are chosen.

Theft is a behavior. Theft is a behavior.

Murder is a behavior.

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