Episode 154: The Cost of Denying Your Own Needs—When Emotional Exhaustion Tells a Deeper Story

The Best of You

That Sounds Fun Network

Health & Fitness, Mental Health

5 • 710 Ratings

🗓️ 17 April 2025

⏱️ 32 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

If you’ve ever felt emotionally exhausted—even while doing all the “right” things—this episode is for you. I’m sharing a personal story and unpacking something I see in so many women I work with: the quiet, often unnoticed pattern of denying your own needs in the name of being kind, helpful, or faithful. We’ll talk about how these patterns take root, how faith communities can unknowingly reinforce them, and why that emotional exhaustion you’re feeling might be trying to tell you something important. In this episode, I explore: * How codependency hides behind helping & overfunctioning * How the fawn response might be showing up in your life * The impact of church messages that tell us to "die to ourselves" without teaching us how to live * What healthy dependence looks like * Why your locus of control—internal vs. external—matters more than you think Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 5: What is Codependency and Why Does it Matter? Episode 14: The Fawn Response & The Hidden Root of People Pleasing Thanks to our sponsors: For 20% off your order, head to Reliefband.com and use code BESTOFYOU. Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Visit GoGeviti.com to learn more about how you can start optimizing your health without leaving home today and use code BESTOFYOU. Contact Restoring the Soul today and learn how their Intensive Counseling Process can jump start your journey to the place you want to be. As a special gift for The Best of You podcast listeners, download their pdf called "5 Ways Unresolved Trauma May Be Derailing Your Relationship." I want all my listeners to enjoy a deep, restful night’s sleep with a new mattress from Birch. Go to birchliving.com/bestofyou for 20% off sitewide! Editing by Giulia Hjort Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:22.9	entrepreneurs like you. Sign up for your $1 a month trial at Shopify.com slash setup.
0:33.2	Hey everyone. I'm Dr. Allison, and I'm so glad you're here to discover what brings out the best of you.
0:42.0	This podcast is all about breaking free from painful patterns, mending the past, and discovering our true selves in God.
0:50.1	I can't wait to get started as we learn together how to become the best version of who we are
0:55.2	with God's help.
0:59.1	Hey, everyone, and welcome back to this week's episode of the Best of You podcast, where we're
1:04.3	going to slow down together for just a moment and listen to the quiet of our own hearts
1:10.7	beneath all the noise outside of us.
1:14.5	I'm so glad you're here.
1:16.3	Today's episode is for all of you who feel spiritually strong but emotionally weary.
1:23.1	You trust God.
1:25.6	You pray.
1:26.8	You try to care deeply for the needs of others. And yet something inside feels stretched thin, frayed at the edges, and quietly hurting. If that sounds familiar, you may just be carrying more than your soul was made to hold all alone. Today's words
1:46.8	are drawn from the pages of the first solo book I wrote. It's called The Best of You. And the book
1:52.3	came out of my own life and my own journey of feeling strong in my faith, but emotionally
1:58.4	fragile at times. And the book was the heartbeat behind this podcast
2:04.7	and behind the work that I've been called to do. And when I recently asked you through a poll
2:10.3	on social media, what topics you wanted me to cover on the podcast? This topic of codependency
	...

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