Episode 135: Taylor Swift’s Philanthropy, Defending Opossums, & The Curse of The Titanic

Madigan's Pubcast

Kathleen Madigan

Madigan, Comedy:stand-up, Standup, Society & Culture, Kathleen Madigan, Comedy, Stand-up

5 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 3 May 2023

⏱️ 86 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Kathleen opens the show drinking a Destin Ale from Destin Brewery. She reviews her weekend on the Florida Panhandle, doing a sold-out show in Niceville and meeting her new possum friend “Roman” backstage. She had shrimp and fresh fish at LuLu’s in Destin and took a beach walk before a massive storm rolled in.

QUEEN NEWS: Kathleen officially introduces new queens Taylor Swift, whom she inducts for “the Children” Termites and because of her amazing philanthropic work, as well as “pocket” Anita Baker (because she’s simply AWESOME) to the Court. She reports that Tanya Tucker and Stevie Nicks are still supporting their respective summer tours, and Cher has broken up with her boyfriend.

“GOOD BAD FOOD”: In her quest for delicious not-so-nutritious food, Kathleen samples French’s Potato Sticks, Heath Riles Garlic Jalapeno Rub, and Original Small Batch Hot Sauce from the Sealey Sauce Company in Mobile AL.

UPDATES: Kathleen gives updates on Coachella, Ralphie the Demon Dog is excelling with his new owner, and the “Cocaine Cat” is recovering at the Cincinnati Zoo.

“HOLY SHIT THEY FOUND IT”: Kathleen is amazed to read about the discovery of the largest Viking treasure hoard in Denmark in 50 years, and archaeologists uncover the first known sculptures of human figures linked to the myth of Atlantis.

FRONT PAGE PUB NEWS: Kathleen shares articles on how to apply for compensation in the Facebook privacy settlement, theories that the Titanic may have been cursed before it set sail, an extinct lion has been spotted in a National Park in Chad, climate change protesters smear paint on a sculpture at the National Gallery, a Scottish island is offered for $190K, $15M in gold is stolen in a Toronto Airport heist, and we learn everything about opossums.

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS: In business news, Kathleen reports that Target is rolling out a new perk for loyal shoppers, and Big Lots and The Container Store are taking Bed Bath & Beyond coupons.

WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEK: Kathleen recommends watching “Vikings Valhalla” on Netflix, and her new stand-up Special “Hunting Bigfoot” on Prime Video.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey everybody, it's me, Kathleen Madigan. Welcome to Madigan's Pubcast. You grab
0:12.9	yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool, and let's talk about what's been going on.
0:17.4	Termites. I'm so 135. So what a crazy week. So many things. First of all though, there's
0:37.6	two new queens in the house. The first one is a mini Anita Baker. Now that was sent to
0:45.2	me from Sharon in regular Michigan. She said she couldn't find a big one. That's okay though,
0:53.7	because in real life, Anita is my height. She is a size. That's her actual size. And we're
1:00.9	going to keep her right here on the desk. And then she is. She's a pocket ball. And that's how I met her.
1:08.6	Very tiny person on an airplane. She couldn't get her luggage up. I didn't even know who she was.
1:13.2	And I'm like, hey, you want some help? Because I'm as short as you. But I think two of us.
1:17.0	And then I picked up my end of her suitcase. And I'm like, dear, God, lady, what are you
1:22.0	trying to do? Gold bars? Are you going on the Titanic after this? What is in here? She just laughed.
1:28.6	And anyway, then we just talked the whole flight and drank screwdrivers and ate
1:33.3	fritos. Yeah, because I asked for fritos. She goes, you know, I haven't thought about a
1:37.5	frito in forever. And then we just ate all the fritos. They're so good. You forget about
1:42.0	fritos. But let's be friends. Anyway, and Queen Tate, now some people think I'm selling out.
1:49.6	So I've read on YouTube comments. No, I'm not. We're going to talk about why in a little while.
1:54.2	I would also like to say that that's probably her actual height with heels. And this is dolly's
1:58.9	actual height. And this is Anita's actual height. She's actually this tiny. And everyone else,
2:06.0	well, Stevie's the next shortest. So thank you, Sharon. I got the baby Anita. Many Anita.
2:13.5	I love it. Pocket it. Pocket Anita. The amount of stuff. First, what am I drinking? Well,
2:19.9	a destined beer for destined ale. My cousin, Mike and his wife, Connie, are in love with destined
2:27.4	Florida. They go all the time. Can't get there fast enough. And he told me where to go to,
	...

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