Episode 127: The Do's and Don'ts of Couples Therapy with Meredith Shirey
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast
Kate Anthony
4.4 • 574 Ratings
🗓️ 22 July 2021
⏱️ 56 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This week I am talking with Meredith Shirey about the do's and don'ts of therapy - individual and couples therapy alike. Meredith is licensed in New York and Tennessee as a Marriage and Family Therapist is a Clinical Fellow member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and the founder of Meredith Shirey Marriage and Family Therapy, PLLC.
In this episode we explore the complexities of therapy including how to know if you should explore individual therapy versus couples therapy, how being disingenuous can sabotage your goals for therapy, codependency, and so much more.
Show Highlights
- When to choose to go to individual therapy versus couples therapy. (6:46)
- Why you should have a consultation with a therapist you're interested in potentially working with and talk about your options. (7:06)
- When going to couples therapy, be sure your therapist is trained specifically in working with couples. (7:55)
- Do you feel like you're going to be able to be completely honest about what you need and how you're feeling in front of your partner and the therapist? If the answer is no, don't do couples therapy. (10:08)
- What to do when you are in therapy and know your partner is not being honest. (24:30)
- The stigma around codependency. (26:56)
- How to get to the point where you are ready to say, "I want to take back my power and create a strategy for myself that focuses on me instead of my partner's issues." (34:06)
- The do's and don'ts of couples therapy. (36:23)
Learn More About Meredith:
Meredith is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in relationally-based issues, and the founder of her NYC based private practice. She is a host of the podcast, "Love Me or Leave Me," and a Topic Expert for Goodtherapy.org. She has written for numerous platforms and has contributed to articles featured on The New York Times, Today.com, and NBC.com on guidelines for difficult conversations, communication tips for couples, and guidance for couples planning to cohabitate or marry.
Meredith's approach to psychotherapy is an integrated approach that includes Attachment theory, Emotionally-Focused Therapy, with notes of Psychodynamic theory. She values a holistic approach and understanding how the past impacts what we experience in the present.
Resources & Links:
Visit: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/the-dos-and-donts-of-couples-therapy-with-meredith-shirey for clickable links
Meredith's website
Meredith on Facebook
Meredith on Instagram
Meredith's podcast, Love Me or Leave Me
Donate to the Thrive Fund
Should I Stay or Should I Go (Kate's Program)
DSG Episode: How to Choose a Good Therapist
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, where we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go. |
| 0:17.7 | I'm Kate Anthony, your divorce survival guide, and I'm here to help you navigate |
| 0:22.8 | some of the roughest waters you've ever swum in and answer some of your toughest questions. |
| 0:28.5 | I've been to hell and back, and now it's my mission in life to help you get to the other side |
| 0:34.2 | of this process with your sanity and your heart intact. |
| 0:44.5 | Hey everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast. My guest today, |
| 0:51.1 | we're having a fabulous conversation. |
| 0:57.3 | This is a conversation about couples therapy, y'all. |
| 1:05.9 | Gosh, you know, I hear so many questions about couples therapy in my Facebook group, on social media. |
| 1:08.0 | People message me about this. |
| 1:13.5 | And, you know, how do you know when you should or should not go to couples therapy with someone what's the test what's the litmus test well we have the answers here today for you |
| 1:21.4 | but before we get into my episode um i just wanted to let you know of a couple of things. One is thank you to those of you |
| 1:31.6 | who did donate to the Thrive Fund last week that I talked about in the intro last week. |
| 1:37.1 | It's really amazing. Your generosity and your outpouring. And the more we raise, the more we're able to support, |
| 1:48.5 | the more women were able to support. So please, please, please, if you haven't already done so, |
| 1:52.5 | head on over to the thrive fund.org, the thrive fund.org and make your donation to support women getting to safety. |
| 2:05.5 | And also, I haven't talked about my program for a while. |
| 2:09.7 | I just feel like I should talk to you guys about it again. |
| 2:13.7 | My program, should I stay or should I go, is, well, I mean, let's just put it this way. It's fucking amazing. |
| 2:24.5 | No, I mean it. I mean, it really is. The women who have gone through it, they say that it is, it is absolutely life changing. |
| 2:32.9 | They say that it is the burning bush, right? If you're |
| 2:36.3 | looking for a burning bush to tell you what to do to get clarity on your situation, this program is |
... |
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