Welcome to Drinking Bros, presented by GhostBed.com, sit back, relax, and grab a fuckin'

dreamy.

Yeah, welcome to Drinking Bros, kids!

We promised you midgets today, we promised you midgets, walking to work today, and guess

what? Chrissy is midgetless today.

I failed you. I came up short, as they say.

You sure did. You didn't reach the bar.

I didn't meet the minimum height requirement to ride this ride.

You did not. What happened to our midget? She's gone.

The midget, my dear feature comic Lila, who will be joining me tonight at Roscoe's comedy

club in Austin. She wanted to stay at the pool. She wanted to work. She said she wanted

to get a little tan.

Oh, god, she got, she got, she says, so we know where her loyalty lies now.

I said, are you sure? Because I, they're affecting you.

Here's what I've learned over the last four weeks, with your little friend. She's a liar.

Oh, no!

That's first and foremost. She's a goddamn liar. She promised us how many midgets was it

last time?

I don't know how many, but it was on July 14th was the 15 midgets.

That's like a midgets dozen right there.

It sure is.

And we were amped for it. We stocked up the studio and then I get a last minute text and

...