Episode 08 – The Christmas Shoes
The Worst Bestsellers
Worst Bestsellers
4.5 • 609 Ratings
🗓️ 8 December 2014
⏱️ 62 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
For this very special holiday episode, Kait and Renata are joined by librarian/Christmas enthusiast Ashley to discuss The Christmas Shoes by Donna VanLiere, the bestselling novel based on a #1 hit single. From this book we learned that Heaven has a dress code and that God will kill as many women as he has to in order to teach rich white men the true meaning of Christmas! Pour yourself some eggnog, put on your crying shoes, and settle in for some good old-fashioned holiday emotional manipulation.
Readers advisory: Here.
Footnotes: Newsong’s “Christmas Shoes” music video
Patton Oswalt’s “Christmas Shoes” animation
Candy pairing: Ashley says candy canes, Kait says generic advent calendar chocolate, Renata says store-bought Christmas cookies.
Coming up next: The Christmas Sweater by Glenn Beck.
* Worst Bestsellers is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.
(But no pressure, we’re also happy if you get these items from your local library or independent bookstore.)
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the worst bestsellers where we read about Christmas cancer so you don't have to. |
| 0:16.7 | I'm Kate. |
| 0:17.8 | And I'm Renata. |
| 0:19.3 | And for this episode, we've read the Christmas shoes by Donna van |
| 0:23.7 | Lyre a bestselling book based on a shitty over-emotional Christmas song by the band New |
| 0:29.4 | Song joining us for this episode is Ashley librarian slash Christmas enthusiast from the |
| 0:35.4 | small Midwestern town of Chicago. |
| 0:38.5 | Hi, Ashley. |
| 0:39.7 | Hi, internet. |
| 0:41.9 | How's it going? |
| 0:45.6 | I mean, we just read this book, so. |
| 0:46.7 | Amazing. |
| 0:47.6 | Right. |
| 0:53.5 | So I've been really self-conscious about what Jesus would think about my footwear. |
| 0:59.2 | Understandably so after this book, it kind of presented that way. |
| 1:02.1 | Yeah, like, I mean, there's snow on the ground. |
| 1:03.7 | I've been wearing my knockoff boots. |
| 1:06.3 | I mean, what if I met Jesus wearing fake ugs? |
| 1:09.4 | I don't think he'd be very pleased with you. |
| 1:13.7 | I mean, he'd probably still let you in, but he wouldn't be, like, very happy. |
| 1:16.7 | Yeah, I wouldn't get to the cool kids table in heaven. |
| 1:18.0 | Mm-mm. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Worst Bestsellers, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Worst Bestsellers and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.