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Guaranteed Human.

I stole nuts from a squirrel and now my life is ruined.

I have always thought of myself as rather intelligent.

My wife says I'm on par with an average chimp or an octopus.

Octopuses are very smart.

And I am proud of this fact.

I recently had the opportunity to engage in a battle of wits

with a squirrel, which I thought would have been an occasion I would be able to rise to, given to my

recent triumph over the dog who I tricked into thinking the ball disappeared. Ah, object impermanence.

But alas! We have a backyard with a nice garden that my wife designed and built.

She's really proud of it and finds a lot of relaxation working on. I work from home and recently I've

noticed that we get a daily visitor. Who is the daily visitor, John? A squirrel! A squirrel in the

garden? How dare it? Who also likes to poke around and look for food?

I usually see him while making breakfast. I almost thought it said, I usually see him while he's making breakfast. I'm like, damn, this squirrel crazy. Yeah, this squirrel flippin omelets. It's like the tic tic tic. You know the ticotts where they have like the tiny tiny pan? Yeah, yeah, the hamster. So I usually walk by the window and watch him forage.

Well, about a week ago, I saw him bury an egg where they have like the tiny tiny pan. So I usually walk by the window and watch him forage.

Well, about a week ago, I saw him bury an acorn or some kind of nut.

Ooh, yeah, bury that nut.

If you catch my drift.

I catch a drift, John.

Literal nut.

Seamen.

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