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Raising Parents with Emily Oster

Ep 8: Should You Have Kids?

Raising Parents with Emily Oster

The Free Press

Parenting, Kids & Family

4.5 • 660 Ratings

🗓️ 13 November 2024

⏱️ 50 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

For most of human history, having kids wasn’t much of a choice. Social expectations, lack of birth control, and limited autonomy for women presented a couple of options: Have children, or join a convent. But the 1960s ushered in a big change. With better options for birth control and expanded career opportunities for women, many people for the first time could choose how many children to have, and whether they should have any at all.  Fast-forward to today: More people are choosing not to have children for a wide range of reasons. Having children, of course, is a personal choice. But it’s a choice that has broader implications. Everywhere across the globe—the U.S., Europe, Asia, Africa—fewer children are being born. And strangely enough, having kids has become part of the culture wars. There are pro-natalist public figures like Elon Musk on one side saying everyone needs to have more kids now in order to save humanity. And on the other side, people like climate activist Greta Thunberg say rising sea levels are so catastrophic that having kids in this era is akin to genocide. But there’s no debate that the fertility rate is plummeting in America and around the world. Presently, American women, on average, have 1.8 kids. In the 1950s, it was 3. The replacement rate in the United States, which is the fertility rate needed for a generation to replace itself without considering immigration, is approximately 2.1 births per woman. Around the world, the fertility rate fell by more than half between 1950 and 2021, as many countries became wealthier and women chose to have fewer children. For economists like Emily, the speed with which the fertility rate is falling is cause for alarm. Economic growth depends, at least in part, on population growth. Retired people rely on generations of younger workers for support, through contributions to Social Security and taxes. With fertility rates in free fall, the math doesn’t add up. That’s the big picture. Now back to our own families. Our series so far has focused on the state of our children. Today, we cap things off with a fundamental question: Should we even have kids in the first place, and what happens if we don’t? *** Resources from this episode: Bryan Caplan: Selfish Reasons To Have More Kids (Bookshop) Gina Rushton The Parenthood Dilemma: Procreation in the Age of Uncertainty (Bookshop) Leah Libresco Sargeant Helena de Groot Ross Douthat

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hi, everyone. Emily here, and you're listening to Raising Parents, my new podcast in partnership with

0:06.0

the free press, where we interrogate all of the big and pressing and confusing questions facing

0:11.6

parents today. Before we get to the show, I'm so excited to tell you that this season is in partnership

0:17.3

with Airbnb. If you know anything about me, you know how much I love Airbnb.

0:22.4

I think I'm currently holding like six Airbnb reservations in my account.

0:27.4

Airbnb has provided incredible experiences for me, my family, and our friends across the

0:33.0

country and the world time and time again.

0:36.3

More on that and how you too can use Airbnb

0:39.2

on your next family trip later in the episode.

0:42.0

For now, on to the show.

0:48.0

I always wanted to have kids.

0:52.0

There was never a question.

0:53.7

So I got older. I know if I ever dated someone who didn't want to have kids, I just probably would have, well, I know I would have ended it because there was no point. It was just always there for me. I wanted to be there for someone and it's very rewarding. Husband and father, really two most important titles. The idea of kids was literally that I would recoil from the thought of that because it seemed so

1:16.5

phenomenally on another planet that I was like, oh God, no, there's no chance of that. I'm just living my life.

1:23.3

I chose to have kids, I guess I definitely thought the world would be a better place with

1:27.9

more of me in it, no doubt.

1:29.5

I was in the boat of two is ideal, and then I got pregnant with our third, and now I realize

1:37.8

how people have many, many, many children.

1:41.7

Because once you have your third, you're like, oh, yeah, we just, like,

1:44.4

keep going. We got this down. We can do this. It comes to talking about child free versus childless.

1:51.0

For some of us, it goes more towards the side of, oh, yeah, I am so child free. I just never thought

1:59.1

about having children. Put my fist in the air and declare with pride,

...

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