Hurrah!

Here in the socialist state of California, Kamasar Gavin Newsom has gifted us with rolling

electrical blackouts that glorify the great progress we have made under Marxist rule.

The blackouts will prevent high capitalist wins from blowing over PG&E's rotting equipment

and causing even more of the glorious forest fires which are all part of the genius of

the wonderful socialist programs which have lifted our state to greatness over the past 30

years.

Under our socialist rule, the state's Public Utilities Commission has forced PG&E to

spend as much as $500 million a year to meet our glorious five-year plan of reducing the

cost of wind and solar energy to low income households.

Thus our socialist overlords have guided the electric company to join the heroic workers

fight against evil capitalist climate change, which, as our infallible socialist computer

models have predicted, will surely destroy the world by seven years ago.

Of course, spending all that money on green energy means PG&E has no money for repairing

the rotten electrical equipment with which billionaires indulge themselves in useless

luxuries like electric lights and cooked food.

And since PG&E can't repair its equipment, it often blows over and starts the beautiful

forest fires which in turn serve our glorious socialist aims by forcing capitalist running

dogs to abandon their energy and efficient single-family homes.

Under our brilliant socialist plan, the fires also spread to our cities so that they can

chase away the rats that have been gathering there due to our deep socialist charity to

the poor who would have no place to sleep or even go to the bathroom if we did not let

...