And thank you so much for joining us once again. It is the Nightly Pleasures podcast, episode number 58.

I am your host and the author of the piece you're about to hear tonight, The Gray Night.

Before we get into our tale tonight, just a humble bit of appreciation.

Thank you to everybody who's rated and reviewed and subscribed

on iTunes, as well as everyone who's purchased and reviewed The Sun, the Girl, and Goodbye.

And finally, just a big thank you to all of my fans. Everywhere. It's been rough these last couple of months, the sickness and everything else.

The erratic schedule, the podcast coming up late. It's not what I want to do, and I know that

you know that, but your patience overall has been astounding and wonderful, and I know not everybody's so lucky, so thank you.

Without further ado, a piece that's been on my mind for a while as I question what's

next in life and as my, frankly, relationship with sex and desire and touch changes.

I bring you just like that. No trigger warnings and enjoy.

Okay, but I just want to be clear about this.

I'm very, very nervous.

I'm not kidding, all right?

Let's be real here, okay?

I'm coming to you.

I've come to you as a man who doesn't have the, well, the courage that I once did.

Things have changed. I've changed and I'm really nervous about this.

You see, sometimes I get so hard. I think I'm going to come just when the wind hits me. I'm

going to come just because I'm looking at a pretty girl too long. I'm nervous. I'm afraid.

What if I'm with some girl, some fan?

And she hates what I do these days.

...