Hello everyone, just I want to just tell you no need to worry but our highly

confident government is launching missiles at asteroids. Luckily they're

completely honest and transparent and there's nothing to be worried about

whatsoever. Now I know we're talking about important things like how many times

your four year old is being forced to attend a drag show this week but have you

stopped to really think about this at all? Isn't it kind of weird like why are we

firing missiles at asteroids? There's really only three possible reasons. Number one

an asteroid might come in our direction someday in the future and it's best to

be prepared just in case. All right number two we were looking at our fancy

telescopes and we saw something like way way way off in the future in the

distance way out there and we thought you know that thing might be coming at

us. So let's figure out if we can knock asteroids off course by firing a

missile at a random one or number three that random asteroid the one we just

fired a missile at is the asteroid they think might hit us. I'm not saying that

that asteroid is going to hit us but what I am saying is if it was going to hit us

this is exactly how they'd sell it to us. Oh we're just testing out options in

case we ever have a situation like this. No need to look any closer at your

telescope don't worry about it at all. You know how this ends? It ends with

Elon Musk sitting by himself on the moon with a Tesla while our entire planet is

destroyed from some random giant asteroid this random giant asteroid. But look at

the bright side with the potential of six more years of Joe Biden. Does being

destroyed by an asteroid really sound all that back?

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