Ep 49 - Avoiding the Shut Down
Healing Broken Trust In Your Marriage After Infidelity
Brad and Morgan Robinson
4.6 • 737 Ratings
🗓️ 15 August 2017
⏱️ 15 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode we talk about what research says about re-engaging the withdrawn spouse. The specific steps you can take to make sure you get the much needed feedback from the partner who traditionally withdraws and pulls away.
If you're ready to take the next step in healing your relationship check out our healing broken trust workshop: https://healingbrokentrustworkshop.com/
You can do it in person or from home. We hope to see you soon!
If you want to learn a little more about us visit our website: healingbrokentrust.com
Read our blog at healingbrokentrustblog.com
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Are you wanting to heal your relationship or maybe you're not sure, but you'd like to explore the idea and that's led you to this podcast. I'm Morgan Robinson and my husband Brad is an international affair recovery expert. Together, we founded marriage solutions, a multi-location group marriage counseling private practice devoted exclusively to helping couples heal and rebuild their relationship to |
| 0:21.3 | stronger than ever before. |
| 0:23.3 | In fact, we're the best-reviewed couples therapists in the Midwest. |
| 0:26.6 | Check us out at My Marriage Checkup.com. Hey guys, welcome to Healing Broken Trust podcast. |
| 0:45.7 | I'm Morgan Robinson. |
| 0:46.7 | And I am Brad Robinson. |
| 0:48.3 | And today we're talking about a topic called, that we're calling, avoiding the shutdown. |
| 0:53.9 | Many of you experience shutting down or avoidance |
| 0:58.3 | or withdrawal in the relationship, either one of you or both of you. And we're going to talk |
| 1:02.8 | about how to avoid that in your conversations because talking about the things that come up |
| 1:09.2 | is really important to most of you. So let's talk about that. |
| 1:12.8 | First, we're going to really talk about some research, right, Brad? Yeah. We've got some |
| 1:17.8 | different research studies here. So stay with us as we read this to you because at the end we're |
| 1:23.0 | going to summarize in a sentence or two what the researchers trying to say. And that you can take home with you. |
| 1:28.7 | Yeah. And I think as we go, we'll try to do a little bit of summarizing too, because it can be, |
| 1:33.6 | you know, research jargon and be kind of hard. But this isn't like a lot of, this isn't like |
| 1:39.9 | endless talking. No. This is just a few sentences of research and then what the conclusion of the |
| 1:46.3 | research is and how you can apply this to your relationship because of the shutdown when that happens |
| 1:52.7 | neither person likes the shutdown. The one who shuts down doesn't like it. Sometimes both people |
| 1:57.9 | shut down when you get shut down on it and that's not fun either. So how can we avoid the shutdown? What can we do? |
| 2:03.6 | And this is maybe a handful of studies here that we have. So we're just going to kind of go through the first one. |
| 2:10.6 | And it's really interesting. It's really fascinating. This was a one-year study done on early newlyweds back in 2010, and these researchers, |
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