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Over It And On With It

EP 478: Getting Clarity on Whether to Leave a Relationship or Not with Valentina

Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler

Mental Health, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Education

4.8 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 20 November 2024

⏱️ 36 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode of Over It and On With It, Christine Hassler coaches Valentina, a listener at a crossroads in her relationship and living situation. Valentina shares the challenges of navigating her partner’s sudden decisions and their impact on her sense of self. This episode dives deep into how family-of-origin patterns influence current relationships, and offers profound insights for anyone questioning their life direction.

 

Christine helps Valentina explore her feelings, confront patterns of compliance and codependency, and move toward clarity and empowerment. Together, they unpack the importance of honoring one’s truth, and voice in relationships and in life.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you find yourself putting others' needs before your own in relationships?
  • Are you afraid to speak your truth, fearing it might lead to conflict or rejection?
  • Have you noticed patterns in your relationships that reflect your childhood experiences?
  • Are you currently in a situation that feels like a compromise of your authentic self?

 

The Guest's Key Insights & A-HA's:

  • Valentina recognizes her tendency to prioritize her partner's desires over her own, a pattern rooted in her upbringing.
  • Christine highlights the importance of self-honoring choices and boundary-setting.
  • Through coaching, Valentina gains clarity on her relationship's dynamics and how they mirror her family history.
  • Valentina finds empowerment in understanding that leaving a relationship or staying should align with her soul’s highest good.

 

How to Get Over It & On With It:

  • Reflect on whether your relationships support or suppress your authentic self.
  • Notice patterns from your family of origin that might be playing out in your current relationships.
  • Prioritize communication and honesty in relationships to foster mutual respect and understanding.
  • Seek external support, whether from therapy or coaching, to help navigate big decisions.

 

Sponsors:

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  • AirDoctor: Breathe clean air with AirDoctor! This powerful air purifier filters out 99.99% of harmful particles, including allergens, mold, bacteria, and viruses. Christine trusts AirDoctor to improve her indoor air quality, especially during mold surges. Receive up to $300 off your AirDoctor purifier at airdoctorpro.com using promo code "OVERIT."

 

Social Media + Resources:

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

This is episode 478, getting clarity on whether to leave a relationship or not with Valentina.

0:08.2

Welcome to Over It and On With It. I'm your host, Christine Hassler, and for over a decade, I've been a life coach, speaker, and author.

0:16.0

Each week, you'll hear me work directly with a caller as I coach them through a goal they want to

0:19.8

accomplish or an obstacle they may be facing. I'll provide a blend of practical and spiritual advice

0:24.6

as well as tangible actions you can apply to your own life. Now, let's get on with the episode.

0:34.2

Hey, everybody, welcome back to the show. As always, I'm so happy to have you here. If you haven't heard my last book, which came out 10 years ago, maybe I'm due for another one, I don't know, is now on Audible in My Voice. That's right. I finally recorded it for the 10 year anniversary in my voice. And if you want to be entered into a contest to win a free coaching session with me,

0:55.5

you can go to Audible, buy the audio version of expectation hangover, leave a rating and review,

1:01.5

take a screenshot of that, and then head on over to Christinehauser.com slash review. And you can be

1:07.4

entered to win. Thank you to those of you who've done so, and I really think you're

1:11.4

going to enjoy the audible version. Today's episode is about getting to clarity around whether a

1:17.6

relationship is serving her anymore. Valentina has been in a relationship for a while. You'll hear

1:24.4

the story, and the story is an important part of it. And she's really at a crossroads

1:29.1

of what to do. And this is such an important episode because it really highlights how we repeat our

1:35.4

family of origin patterning and wounding in relationship. And unless we have a partner who's really

1:42.7

willing to do their family of origin healing,

1:45.7

in addition to working on the dynamic in the relationship, we're just going to live out

1:50.7

our childhood in relationship.

1:52.6

And it's often not the choice that's for our highest good.

1:58.0

Spoiler alert, that one.

2:00.3

So as you are listening to this episode, consider, did you grow up

2:04.9

in a home where your needs weren't put first? Did you have a selfish or even narcissistic

2:12.2

parent? Do you feel like in relationship you're consistently or often accommodating to other people's needs

...

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