EP. 394 | Danny Dyer Gets BRUTALLY Honest: West Ham’s Decline, Fake Big Club Fans & Spurs Relegation
That Peter Crouch Podcast
Tall or Nothing
4.4 • 2.5K Ratings
🗓️ 20 March 2026
⏱️ 72 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
On this week’s episode of That Peter Crouch Podcast, Pete, Chris, and Sids are joined by actor, lifelong West Ham fan, and all-round football obsessive Danny Dyer—and it gets properly lively.
From the moment he walks in, Danny brings unfiltered opinions on modern football, tearing into everything from agents and player loyalty to the state of fan culture today. He opens up about his latest film, where he plays a ruthless football agent, revealing just how accurate (and brutal) that world really is behind the scenes.
The conversation dives deep into West Ham’s rollercoaster journey, including that unforgettable Conference League win, the pain of leaving Upton Park, and why some players simply don’t care enough when relegation is on the line. Danny doesn’t hold back either on fans switching clubs, calling out what he sees as a growing disconnect in the game.
There’s also chaos, of course—caravan parks, phone networks, McDonald’s debates, and one of the most random tangents the pod has ever seen.
And once Danny heads off, the lads wrap things up with Cheltenham stories, Premier League predictions, and the usual end-of-show madness.
If you like your football chat honest, raw, and very funny… this one’s for you.
Chumbawamba
00:00 - Intro & Cris’ birthday chaos
02:10 - McDonald’s XI & football banter
04:12 - Captain armbands in everyday jobs
06:25 - Best motorway services debate
08:30 - McDonald’s horror stories & late-night cravings
09:31 - Danny Dyer joins the podcast
10:45 - New film explained: football agent role
12:05 - “Agents are powerful… and not nice”
13:30 - Acting method & career reflections
15:10 - Filming alone for 10 days straight
16:40 - Singing scene chaos & improvisation
18:00 - Football Factory & early career impact
21:10 - Growing up around football culture
23:00 - “You can’t choose your football club”
24:40 - Modern football fan criticism
27:30 - West Ham Conference League win reaction
29:10 - West Ham ownership & club frustrations
33:10 - Jarrod Bowen, family & media pressure
35:30 - “He should be in the England squad”
38:00 - England chances at major tournaments
39:30 - Favourite West Ham players ever
42:20 - Best Upton Park memories
44:00 - Caravan parks & random fan questions
45:20 - Phone networks debate (chaos segment)
46:40 - Spurs relegation debate
48:20 - Millwall rivalry & fan culture
52:05 - Danny Dyer leaves the podcast
53:00 - Paddy Power Cheltenham stories
55:00 - Fancy dress & Wolf of Wall Street moment
56:30 - Premier League run-in analysis
59:00 - Spurs, Liverpool & relegation talk
01:03:00 - Final predictions & mini-league pressure
01:07:00 - Closing thoughts & outro
For more Peter Crouch:
Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch
Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch
For more Chris Stark
Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_Stark
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/
For more Steve Sidwell
Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14
#PeterCrouch #ThatPeterCrouchPodcast
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello and welcome to that Peter Crutch podcast. |
| 0:01.9 | Me, Peter Crutch, Notorious This Idea and Chris Stark are with me. Many happy returns, Chris, is your birthday this week. Thank you, yeah. Have a nice week? It was good, yeah, and thank you for your lovely messages as well. Was good. Yeah, I must admit, it was good. What was it? Homemer down? Yeah, yeah. A few drinks or go out? Plenty of lasagna. |
| 0:21.7 | Was there? |
| 0:22.4 | Yeah. |
| 0:37.9 | Yeah. Homemade? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I saw a picture of your Mrs. cooking you lasagna. Yeah. It's our thing, isn't it? Oh, yeah. Yeah. And I've got some good lasagna. Which is really? But it was my birthday. |
| 0:38.9 | Yeah, of course. |
| 0:39.7 | Once a year. |
| 1:11.6 | It was, it was a lovely birthday. Don't know I've indulged you. It was a lovely birthday. And I got a lovely surprise with the pussycat dolls. I saw they're in, yeah. Yeah. On the show. They were reforming in honour of my birthday, of course. No, have they? They have reformed because of you. Did you know they was coming in to the studio? You must not. I didn't. Well, no, I knew that we had a special guest because last year on my birthday, Big John turned up with some breakfast. And you don't be... with some breakfast and you don't think you can top that really not i can you it's a bit of an upgrade so Thursday uh was my |
| 1:18.8 | birthday uh i got lovely message from you both uh but you were going to cheltenham that day incredible |
| 1:24.7 | you sent me a message saying the the helicopter's leaving in an hour |
| 1:27.8 | if you can get there. |
| 1:30.3 | Well, we mentioned it on here |
| 1:32.0 | and I realized you had mentioned it again. |
| 1:34.6 | I said, do you know, |
| 1:35.3 | we're available. |
| 1:36.4 | I know. |
| 1:37.2 | I love the coolest message I've ever received. |
| 1:40.8 | Up pops Peter Crouch, |
| 1:42.4 | chopper's leaving in an hour |
| 1:43.3 | if you can make it |
| 1:44.5 | I'm just |
| 1:45.8 | how's life got to that |
... |
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