Ep. 376: Talking to Your Kids About Loss
Big Fat Positive: Pregnancy and Parenting (BFP)
Laura Birek, Shanna Micko
4.7 • 531 Ratings
🗓️ 15 September 2025
⏱️ 49 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In the special segment “Stump the Moms,” Shanna and Laura quiz each other with parenting-related trivia questions about gender representation in kids' books, the cost of high-end summer camps and more. Also, Shanna talks about the passing of a beloved family member, how she told her kids about the loss and how they processed their grief. Laura discusses the ups and downs of her 4-year-old's first week in TK at a new school. Finally, the moms share their BFPs and BFNs for the week. Shanna's kids are 6.5 and 9.5 years old, and Laura’s kids are 6.5 years old and 4.5 years old.
Topics discussed in this episode:
-Telling your kids about the death of a family member
-Surprising ways that kids process and handle grief
-Easing your 4-year-old into their first week of elementary school ever
-Fun facts about kids' books authors
-Summer camp trends
-Gendered characters in kids' books
-Sensitive vs. resilient kids
Products, links, resources mentioned in this episode:
-"Bears Will Be Boys: A data analysis of animal gender in children’s books" article in The Pudding
-Different Pointe of View restaurant
Past BFP episodes mentioned in this episode:
-Ep. 375 (For the episode where Shanna talks about her family's trip to Phoenix)
This episode's full show notes can be found here.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to Big Pat Positive with Shauna and Laura. |
| 0:05.2 | This week we have our weekly check-ins. |
| 0:07.2 | We have our special segment, Stump the Mom, where Sean and I quiz each other on children's |
| 0:12.2 | book bombshells and summer camp shockers. |
| 0:15.8 | And we close with our BFPs and BFNs for the week. |
| 0:18.7 | Let's get to it. |
| 0:23.7 | Hello, hello, everyone. Welcome to episode 376. Hello, Shana. Hello. Hello. Okay, so normally I'd let you do a little bit of a |
| 0:30.9 | preamble to your check-in, but I know it's been a tough week, and this might be a tough topic to get |
| 0:35.9 | into. So I just want to ask how you're |
| 0:38.3 | doing and if you want to give our listeners a little heads up of what's been going on. Yeah, yeah, |
| 0:43.6 | of course, especially since last week. I talked about how our family went out to Phoenix to visit my mom and stepdad because he's been quite ill and we really wanted to see him. Unfortunately, his health |
| 0:56.4 | continued to decline. He was put on hospice while we were there in Phoenix last time. And I decided |
| 1:04.5 | I really wanted to go back to Phoenix after I got the girls started in school and just be there |
| 1:09.2 | with my mom. She had called to tell me, you know, |
| 1:12.7 | things weren't looking great. So I booked another flight out to go be with them for the week. |
| 1:19.3 | And unfortunately, my stepdad did pass away the night before I went back out there. But I did go, right? Because I was really wanted to be |
| 1:31.2 | there for my mom and for the family and stuff. So I went out by myself. Stephen the kids stayed here |
| 1:38.4 | because it was their first like full week of school. And yeah, I've just spent the week doing a lot of family time and grieving and |
| 1:47.2 | remembering my stepdad and being there for my mom and doing all the stuff that comes along |
| 1:52.2 | with that. Yeah, I unfortunately know that process myself and it's not fun. But I'm really |
| 1:58.3 | glad you got to go. I know that when we were talking, you were saying that he was not doing well and that you were going to go right back out. |
| 2:05.6 | And then he passed away, I think, like the middle of the night, right? |
... |
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