EP. 355 | ‘We’ve Gone Global’ Crouchy Passes the Pod to Ronaldo, Iniesta, Cafu and More!

That Peter Crouch Podcast

Tall or Nothing

Sports, Football

4.4 • 2.5K Ratings

🗓️ 7 January 2026

⏱️ 74 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

New year, same chaos. Crouchy's dialling in from Dubai, Sid’s gone full flamenco, and Chris is still reeling from missing the greatest night in Ally Pally history.

In this episode, the boys catch up post-Christmas and somehow end up covering robot massages, dodgy gift-giving, Sidwell’s ambition to become a Spanish guitar-playing Gypsy King, and whether the pod should launch a residency at Finsbury Park.

Crouchy talks us through meeting Ronaldo at the World Sports Summit (yes, that Ronaldo), putting the podcast on the global stage, and why there’s a very real chance we could become PSG’s shirt sponsor.

There’s also a very passionate rant about the FA Cup, a long-overdue roasting of Tottenham’s home form, and Chris has an existential breakdown over kids dressing as referees for Christmas.

Darts. Destiny. Desmonds. Let’s go."

00:00 – Welcome back: robot hands, bad presents & Sid’s groans

04:30 – Sidwell's musical ambitions: Finsbury Park warm-up act?

05:00 – Crouchy’s Busted moment at the O2 (yes, really)

10:00 – Ronaldo finally meets his hero (kind of)

20:00 – Pod in Paris? Crouchy makes big moves in Dubai

25:00 – “You’ve put us on the world stage”

33:00 – Chris’s extreme darts FOMO

34:00 – Sidwell tips the bar staff: total Ally Pally carnage

38:00 – Darts of Destiny: £5K, nine darts and one Curtis

53:30 – FA Cup fever: Crouchy’s rallying cry

1:07:00 – The game’s gone: kids with VAR screens for Christmas

1:08:30 – Are referees becoming influencers now?

1:10:00 – Ref talk, tights, and a gladiator future

1:42:00 – The annual missionary predictions: Spurs v Villa

1:56:00 – Dubai days & Crouchy’s global glow-up

1:59:00 – Arsenal, Wrexham and third-round mayhem

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	This podcast is part of the A-Class Creator Network.
0:04.4	Hello and welcome to that Peter Crouch podcast with me, Peter Crouch.
0:08.2	Notorious S-I-D and Chris Starker with me.
0:12.2	How are you, boys, holding a thought for me?
0:14.2	I'm very good Crouchy and obviously happy New Year.
0:16.8	We're still saying it.
0:18.5	SIDS over here is making all sorts of groaning noises.
0:22.5	And I don't know if you can see why crouchy,
0:25.0	because I'm aware that we're remote at the moment
0:26.9	and you're abroad.
0:29.2	But SIDS is having a little go on my Christmas present here.
0:33.2	How would you like to describe it?
0:35.2	It's absolutely sensational.
0:37.4	I mean, I could drift off. I'm going to have't have to take... I'm going to take it off. Is it... Is it a bum plug? This is great because it's a podcast as well. If you can't see it, have a little guess where it could be. It's not a plug, no, nor is it... What is it? it, is it, is it, is it is it going to pull it out? Yeah, have a look at this crouchy. So I got this for Christmas and it's a little massager with two little hands on it. Can you see this? And they just gently rotate. Okay. They just gently rotate there, Pete. And, uh, and, uh and massage your neck as you go.
1:13.5	I was going to let you have a go on it, but then last minute you've decided to stay abroad, haven't you?
1:17.7	So I'll save it for when you're next back.
1:20.6	It's almost worth coming home for that.
1:22.8	I mean, it does look sensational.
1:24.7	What did it feel like, Sid?
1:25.9	Honestly, that was...
1:27.4	It actually feels like, if you actually close your eyes, it actually feels like someone's hands. Actually, honestly, genuinely feels like a nice, deep, slow massage. Well, it's odd, isn't it? Because it is two little hands. They've even got little nails on them. So it's two little fake rubber hands there. Love that. Goodbye. Good purchase that. Well, it's odd, isn't it? Because it is two little hands. They've even got little nails on them. So it's two little fake rubber hands there. Love that. Goodbye. Good purchase that.
1:48.2	Well, Christmas present. What did you get for Christmas, Pete?
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Tall or Nothing, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Tall or Nothing and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.