Hello, my beautiful people, and welcome back to another episode of shit. I'm 30 with me, your host, Carlo Womeres. And yes, we are in the week where we're eating too damn much and spending way too much money. Every year the holidays get here and I'm like, what the hell? When did this happen? And why didn't I put money outside for all this? Like it doesn't come at the same time every single year. I know I can't be the only one. I can't be. Then I have this child who thinks money grows on trees asking for Mac computers and million-dollar homes like I can just go and buy her a new house. Whose kid does that? All I know is that this year is going to be one for the books. I wouldn't be giving my loved ones so much love.

They're not even going to miss the fact that I'm not getting them dilly squat. I'm really not. No, I'm just kidding. I might just go to five below and get I had two things. That's about $10. Oh, my poor baby doesn't know what's coming for her. It's Christmas. Thank gosh. She doesn't believe in Santa Claus anymore.

Anyway, before today's fun podcast, I'm going to be joined by the amazing ladies from the Oprah Rose Show in New York City. And I wanted to acknowledge the fact that I know that the holidays can be hard for a lot of people before we start. The story of Kim Porter resonated so much with me because this year, not only will it be another year without my father who passed away in 2016, but it reminds me that a lot of us will be enjoying our loved ones that are still here, but we're also going to be missing the ones that are not. I went to therapy last night with my therapist, and she noticed the second that I walked and she's like, um, you seem different. You seem low. And I'm like,

no, I'm not. But I was. I try to hide that sometimes, but it doesn't happen. Those that aren't around me 24-7, which is only really my boyfriend and my daughter. It seems that I'm always happy or goofy or making jokes or saying something stupid, but I do have my days where my anxiety takes over. I just don't know what to do. I don't know why certain things are happening.

And it takes me some time when I sit down and think about what. have my days where my anxiety takes over. I just don't know what to do. I don't know why certain things are happening.

And it takes me some time when I sit down and think about why is it happening. And I remember sitting in therapy and I'm telling my therapist, wow, I have all these first world problems when she's like, well, don't demean your problems and how you feel because sometimes I'm like, what is wrong with me? why am I complaining about the stupidest things when there are people that are going through worse?

And she's like, what is wrong with me? Why am I complaining about the stupidest things when there are people that are going through worse? And she's like, well, these are your problems and they're making you feel some type of way and they're bringing you down and they're making you anxious so then we still have to deal with them. Don't just tell yourself, hey, they don't matter. So my plan for this week was going to be the exact same thing that I've been doing since my dad passed away, and that is hide out and avoid all humans.

Well, I can't really avoid my daughter because she's just around.

And I can't avoid my boyfriend either.

So anyone that was planning on doing the same thing that I've been doing this year, don't do it.

I'm not going to do it, so you don't do it. I have to start showing emotions, especially to my

daughter. So I actually have scheduled an emotional time block with my daughter for Thursday.

Yeah, better clap for me because this is big for me. That's um this year Thanksgiving and my father's birthday

fall on the same day. And ever since he passed away, I don't show emotion when it comes to him.

I'll cry sometimes to myself like in the shower. I'll get myself a designated five minutes a month

by myself after I've dropped her off in the car. You know, somewhere no one is seeing me.

But I realize that I think I'm hurting her and I'm probably hurting myself as well because I'm not showing her emotions and I'm

doing the same thing my mother did to me. So I'm like, okay, Carla, you've been complaining

about the fact that this happened to you and how it affected you and now you're doing the exact same

thing. So if you're planning on hiding, don't do it. Schedule time to be around

people or do something that you weren't planning on doing. It doesn't have to be a long time.

Shoot. Listen to mine because it sure as hell won't me. I'm going to have on Thursday about two

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