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Slack.com slash DHQ. With the investigation into Trump's collusion with Russia, stalled

on the fact that Trump never colluded with Russia, Democrats have issued a call for, quote,

new useless investigations into even more meaningless matters.

On quote, among the issues Democrats want to investigate are where do babies come from

and when did Donald Trump know it? Who put the bomb and the bomb, the bomb, the bomb? And

do you think I need to see a doctor about this mark on my chest or is it just a mole?

Democrats say these questions cannot be answered without forming new committees appointing special

councils and holding gigantic magnifying glasses up to their eyes so that their faces

look extra big. Adam Schiff, who wears many hats as an investigator, including one with

a propeller that goes around in a circle when he pulls the string under his chin, says

the House Committee on shiny objects needs to open an inquiry into whether Donald Trump

is obstructing justice when he fired James Comey or whether it was when he fired Andrea

Lake during the fifth season of the apprentice. Schiff told reporters, quote, I know Comey

behaved in a suspiciously partisan and self-serving manner, but I thought Andrea deserved another

chance. On quote, Schiff says a special council should also be appointed to examine whether

it was Republicans who stole his GI Joe figure when he was eight years old or if his big

brother really did stick its head in the garbage disposal to get Joe to confess to where

...