With the election behind us, it's time to step back and take a look at the broader picture

of American politics and fall to weeping quietly before drinking ourselves into a stupor.

Basically, Americans are now confronting two conflicting views of economics, foreign

policy, and cultural standards.

In the Republican view of the economy, freedom is the order of the day.

Capitalism ensures that you have the choice to spend your own money on whatever meaningless

disposable drink it happens to catch your fancy while putting your kids' tuition on a credit

card and paying 22% interest on it until you're so deep in debt that you become a Democrat

and go on welfare.

In the Democrat view of the economy, the government is here to give you whatever you want so that

you're free to use your time to write a poem or hold up a liquor store or share your

oxy prescription with your illegitimate child.

Now you may ask Democrats how are you going to pay for all that, to which they reply,

look over there or man who can't use the girls' bathroom even though he's wearing a dress.

And then we argue about that instead.

In the Republican view of foreign policy, our nation should never go to war unless we

get really angry and then we should invade a lot of random countries with just enough

force to keep the conflict going until Democrats can come to power and surrender.

In the Democrat view of foreign policy, our nation should never invade other countries

at all so that the evil doers rise to power everywhere and the world devolves into tyranny

and chaos until Republicans come to power and get so angry that they invade a lot of

random countries until Democrats can come to power and surrender.

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