The following podcast is a dear media production.

Hello and welcome to Raising Good Humans.

I'm Dr. Eliza Pressman and today it's just you and me.

I'm answering listener questions.

I'm gonna go over things like learning from mistakes dealing with failures and

losing, when to start a sleepover play date, getting rid of the pacifier,

and grandparents with different parenting styles.

I really love your questions, so keep them coming and they're really helpful for everybody. The first question is, really helpful for everybody.

The first question is, I have a five-year-old who easily gets frustrated.

If she's busy with an activity and she doesn't get it right or if we're playing what could be seen as a competitive game like running or putt putt

she throws a fit if she isn't winning or getting it right for the first time we've never encouraged perfection or winning and I'm always

telling her that making mistakes or not getting it right is part of learning and growing.

It's come to the point where we don't really want to take her out if it involves games, especially with her friends.

How can we resolve this? That is very frustrating both for your five-year-old and I'm sure for you guys.

So it sounds like there's an opportunity here

to focus on growth mindset,

the idea that you have the ability to change and grow, that your mind is not

fixed with what it was given from the beginning and that when you practice things you get

stronger better smarter and so that's easier for some kids than others it tends to be difficult for kids who are perfectionists and if

you can imagine how difficult it is, for those of you who have perfectionist tendencies, you understand this, I'm sure, but imagine what it's like to

think that you're supposed to get something right the first time and how hard on yourself you would be and how that might make you angry

because you're having you know a basic reaction, stress reaction to feeling like you failed.

...