But there'll be all sorts of things that I would have wanted as a kid that I couldn't have, right?

Famously Sky TV.

Hello and welcome to The Troll, where we scroll through social media so you don't have to.

I'm Marina Perkis.

And I'm Gemma Forte, and today we are going to try to cram as much insane stuff as we possibly can into this episode. But there is

literally so much trawl gold. And then there's Macron announcing an election and all that stuff.

So that's going to have to go into another episode. But before we dive in, let's just start by wondering

which names sound so grown up.

You can't imagine anyone deciding upon it for their baby.

Here's Italian back from Instagram with his reflections.

Here are some names that will go extinct because they can't be breastfed.

They simply need to be born at 40 years old otherwise everyone gets

uncomfortable. Number one, Craig. You can't breastfeed Craig. Craig should be doing taxes,

not trying to walk for the first time. Next up is Clive. You can try and make it cute for a

baby with nicknames like Cheese and Clive dip, but it's just a full grown man. Next up is Simon. By all means if you can hold them in

for 40 years rather than pumping them out your bum at nine months, call them whatever you want,

but you can't have a Simon crawling around. Next up you've got Richard. Come on. No one wants to

hold Richard. It's weird. Next up is Jeffrey. I don't know. I just have the overwhelming urge to shake its hand, even if it is a baby.

Next one is Alan. I don't even think you could breastfeed Alan if you tried.

He wouldn't take to the tea. He'd rather have a black coffee, I'm sure.

Next up is Mark. If you decide on Mark before the baby is born,

he will come out in a three-piece suit.

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