Ready to launch your business? Get started with the commerce platform made for entrepreneurs. Shopify is specially designed to help you start, run and grow your business with easy customizable themes that let you build your brand, marketing tools that get your products out there. Integrated shipping solutions that actually save you time. From startups to scaleups, in-person, and on the go. Shopify is made for

entrepreneurs like you. Sign up for your $1 a month trial at Shopify.com slash setup.

Recently, some of you may have noticed the Cracker Barrel Restaurant and Gift Store chain

changed its logo. They removed the picture of the so-called

old-timer who was meant to represent the chain's southern style comfort food and old-fashioned

country store feeling and left that space blank to represent the pit of fiery eternal damnation

loud with the shrieks of the condemned into which the chain had fallen by supporting

child sex changes, drag shows for children, and racist hiring practices. The move was supposed to help

the struggling chain's finances by ensuring that no conservative customers entered one of their

venues ever again. Those alienated customers would be replaced by large numbers of imaginary

progressives just waiting for an old-fashioned down-home southern-style restaurant catering to

pedophilia-adjacials with a hankering for crunchy fried chicken. But right-wing activists loudly

protested the logo change, and when it turned out the new imaginary

customers were paying for their imaginary meals with imaginary money, cracker barrel was forced

to replace the old-timer in the empty space, in the hopes they could keep their usual customers

and avoid the eternal shriek-filled pit of sin-tortured souls the empty space represented.

Now, at this point, the flaming shriek-filled pit of sin-tortured souls the empty space represented. Now, at this point,

the flaming shriek-filled pit of sin-tortured souls, known as the American news media,

began to express their opinions, which were all the same opinion, because all the American news media's opinions are decanted from a single brain, which is kept on a lightning-lashed altar

in the fog-shrouted cave-dwelling of Chernabog, who was the demon from Bald Mountain in Disney's

Fantasia before he left to take a job in Disney's animation department.

The opinion of the news media was that conservatives were, oh, so very silly to make such a big fuss over a meaningless

...