Emotional Labor: The Invisible Work (Most) Women Do
Dear Sugars
WBUR
4.5 • 5.9K Ratings
🗓️ 5 May 2018
⏱️ 45 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Remembering the grocery list, coordinating with the babysitter, making food for the potluck, scheduling a get-together with the in-laws: These are some of the invisible tasks that (most) women exclusively do in their romantic relationships — and the list goes on and on. Women from across the country wrote in to the Dear Sugars inbox echoing identical inequalities in their relationships with their husbands and boyfriends. The Sugars commiserate with this aggrieved chorus, along with Gemma Hartley, the writer who set off a national conversation about emotional labor with her …
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | The universe has good news for the lost, lonely, and heart sick. |
| 0:09.8 | The sugars are here, speaking straight into your ears. |
| 0:13.4 | I'm Steve Olman. |
| 0:14.6 | I'm Cheryl Strayed. |
| 0:15.6 | This is Dear Sugar's. |
| 0:17.6 | Oh dear song, won't you please? |
| 0:26.3 | Yeah, some little sweet days would be. |
| 0:33.3 | I check my bell vibes every day. |
| 0:41.3 | Oh, and this sugar, using my way. |
| 0:49.3 | Dear sugars, I don't have a huge burning question, |
| 0:53.3 | but I'd like to figure out how to get my husband to understand emotional labor without sounding like I'm just complaining. |
| 1:00.3 | He has come a long way, but I'd love advice about how to get him to be more empathetic and to understand that being in charge of providing the food, |
| 1:08.3 | clothes, doctors, medicines, activities, and holidays are two children and our pets takes a toll. |
| 1:15.3 | When I complain of being mentally exhausted because of how much I do, |
| 1:19.3 | my husband's typical response is to tell me about all the work he does around the house. |
| 1:24.3 | I'm sad to say that we conform to gender roles when it comes to the division of labor, much to my chagrin. |
| 1:31.3 | Perhaps an example would help. |
| 1:33.3 | This is my morning. |
| 1:35.3 | I get up at the same time as my children, who are now 12 and 14, as I have done since they were born. |
| 1:41.3 | I help them with their breakfast and lunches, feed both of our dogs, and make sure they go to the bathroom before they're created for the work day. |
| 1:49.3 | Meanwhile, my husband, who has, quote, trouble getting out of bed, likes that I wake him with a kiss as the three of us leave, |
| 1:57.3 | so he can get ready for work all by himself. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from WBUR, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of WBUR and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.