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The One You Feed

Emiliya Zhivotovskaya

The One You Feed

Eric Zimmer

Education, Self-improvement, Religion & Spirituality, Health & Fitness, Buddhism, Mental Health

4.62.5K Ratings

🗓️ 30 September 2014

⏱️ 43 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I was lucky enough to catch Emiliya Zhivotovskaya near the end of Camp GLP and we were able to sit down in her small room on the floor, holding microphones and have this conversation. I think we were both very tired after a great weekend at camp. She had delivered numerous workshops, emceed the Talent Show and was feeling under the weather to boot. nulltheless it was a wonderful and warm conversation. Enjoy!!
At the age of 5, Emiliya and her family fled from Kiev, escaping the fall of Communism and the nuclear disaster at Chernobyl. She found herself in a new land, faced with challenges completely foreign to the average kid growing up in a New York suburb. Then, 9 years later, she faced yet another tragedy, the sudden loss of her brother as he ran to save his fiancé from drowning and lost his life in the process of saving hers. And years later, the loss of her mother.
From this place of deep challenge, she could have turned to the dark side. She could have given up, blamed the world and walked away from joy. From happiness. From possibility. Instead, she found awakening, strength and a renewed sense of gratitude. She discovered within herself a wellspring of resilience and a relentless desire to understand where this came from and how to bring a similar lens to others. She was determined to help others flourish.
Her exploration quickly developed into a lifelong quest, leading her to study psychology at Long Island University, then get her masters degree in applied positive psychology from the University of Pennsylvania under the guidance of the legendary founder of the science, professor Martin Seligman. Graduating summa cum laude, she has gone on to found the Certification in Positive Psychology program at the Open Center and head up her own endeavor, The Flourishing Center. Emiliya is also currently pursuing her Ph.D. in Mind-Body Medicine at Saybrook University, where she is also on the graduate faculty. (Curriculum Vitae)
Emiliya Zhivotovskaya is widely acclaimed for her striking ability to share the transformative power of positive psychology, deliver actionable and specific strategies that yield tangible, measurable results. And share these ideas in a wonderfully engaging and entertaining way.
In This Interview Emiliya and I Discuss...

The One You Feed parable.
How both wolves are part of the human condition.
How to feed both wolves and integrate them.
Courage is not a lack of fear but having the ability to move through it.
The bad wolf is trying to protect us, it is part of our evolutionary programming.
What is positive psychology?
How both positive and negative emotions are useful.
The role of positive psychology in handling depression and anxiety.
Depression masquerading as loneliness.
Why there are not more depression support groups.
Depression as learned helplessness.
The criticality of exercise in handling depression (Want to be depressed? Don't exercise!)
The BDNF and Serotonin loop.
Taking micro-steps to build new habits.
The biological wiring of social comparison.
The role of gratitude in feeling better.
How gratitude shifts the brain into a more expansive state.
The small tweak that makes gratitude much more powerful.
How negative emotion and problem solving are not connected, they can be pulled apart.
That negative emotions make problem solving worse and narrows our ability to see options.
How positive emotions help us move into broaden and build mode.
That pain as a motivator falls prey to the law of diminishing returns.
Eustress-the role of useful stress.
The difference between useful and destructive stress.
Thinking about being happier but not taking any action is worse than not thinking about it all.
The fixed vs growth mindset.
How you can't enjoy the journey when stuck in the fixed mindset and the growth mindset creates the conditions to enjoy the journey.


Emiliya Zhivotovskaya Links
Emiliya Zhivotovskaya Homepage
Emiliya Zhivotovskaya Facebook
Emiliya Zhivotovskaya Twitter
Certificate in Positive Psychology created by Emiliya Zhivotovskaya


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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

People don't realize that the negative emotion and the problem-solving are not the same thing.

0:14.2

Welcome to the One You Feed.

0:16.2

Throughout time, great thinkers have recognized the importance of the thoughts we have,

0:20.8

quotes like garbage in, garbage out, or you are what you think, ring true.

0:26.5

And yet, for many of us, our thoughts don't strengthen or empower us.

0:30.7

We tend toward negativity, self-pity, jealousy, or fear.

0:35.5

We see what we don't have instead of what we do.

0:38.3

We think things that hold us back and dampen our spirit.

0:41.8

But it's not just about thinking.

0:43.8

Our actions matter.

0:45.2

It takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life worth living.

0:50.1

This podcast is about how other people keep themselves moving in the right direction,

0:54.5

how they feed their good wolf.

1:07.3

Hi, it's Elvis Jaran.

1:08.6

On my new podcast, Thinking Out Loud with Elvis Jaran.

1:12.2

I'll be bringing you candid and maybe sometimes a little crazy interviews with people from all walks of life.

1:17.1

We'll touch on subjects that you just can't talk about on the radio, like life, love, success, failure, whatever else comes to mind.

1:23.3

But I'll jacked up because after being in this business for as long as I have,

1:27.2

I want to get to the bottom of what makes people tick.

1:29.8

And listen to my new podcast, Thinking Out Loud on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

1:38.8

At the age of five, Amelia Shivattowskaya and her family fled from Kiev,

1:43.3

escaping the fall of communism and the nuclear disaster at Chernobyl.

...

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