This is the Guardian.

Today, Helen Pied always wanted to be a mum.

Can she come to terms with never having a baby?

The Guardian is a mum.

Just before we start, I want to let you know that this episode contains a little bit of bad language.

So for my hen do, we'd hired a cottage in the Lake District, quite near Windermere with a hot tub

and filled the fridge in the kitchen with absolutely masses of booze.

And it was just such a fun weekend of having my favourite women in the world

all together in one place. And Lexi, who was my best woman, had organised this game of

Mr and Mrs. I don't know if you know how that game works but basically it tests how well you know

your partner. And so what they'd done is they'd gone and asked Ian my fiancee as was.

A load of questions about our relationship and about me to see how well he knew me and then

they asked me the same questions and then you kind of compare and contrast.

And like it started fairly normal, like where was your first kiss? Like who's the better dancer,

who's the better dresser? And then there was just one question which like suddenly sobbing me up

and the question was what is your greatest fear?

And we're having a right laugh and I was thinking I know what the real answer is but if I should

I tell the truth because it could kill the vibe a bit and I sort of thought well if you can't be

honest with your best friends then who can you be? So I gave the truthful answer which was that my

greatest fear was to not be able to have children. And this awful hush descended on the room and one

of the hens hurriedly filled my glass to the brim with Prosecco. And it's weird it kind of really

stuck with me that question and my answer to that question in the subsequent years

...