Effectively Communicating (God's Love to Your Mate), Part 2

Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram Daily Podcast

Living on the Edge

Christianity, Religion & Spirituality

4.8 • 1.8K Ratings

🗓️ 26 February 2026

⏱️ 25 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Stop the small talk. Chip shares how to move beyond logistics to have genuine heart-to-heart conversations with your spouse starting today.

How to effectively communicate:

I. The command – Put on the proper attire -Colossians 3:12

COMPASSION – Empathy to action vs. cynical -Matthew 9:36
KINDNESS – Whatever is helpful, beneficial vs. critical -Jeremiah 9:23-24, John 4
HUMILITY – Their needs first, posture of a servant -Philippians 2:5-11
GENTLENESS – Strength under control, your emotions -Matthew 11:28-30
PATIENCE – Endure with a good attitude -2 Peter 3:8-9

II. Why the “clothing” metaphor is crucial to biblical communication

“Old clothes” must be taken off. -Colossians 3:8-9
The new self requires “new clothes”. -Colossians 3:10-11

The Principle: Who we are determines how we “dress” (communicate from the heart)

III. The problem:

We have settled for techniques and self-help tools to change how we speak, and to modify our emotions and behaviors to improve compatibility; rather than focusing on the deep-rooted transformation of our hearts which empowers us to give the life-giving love of Christ to our mates.

IV. The solution is threefold:

1. Don’t buy the old lies*

I am what I have: Possessions
I am what I accomplish: Performance
I am what others think of me: Popularity

2. Dress appropriately for your mate

A – AFFIRMATION
W – WARMTH
E – ENCOURAGEMENT

3. Have at least 2 “couples conferences” per week**

What are you concerned about?
What do you wish?
What are you willing to do?

*Discover Your True Self book and Affirmation Cards by Chip Ingram and Theresa Ingram.

**Marriage that Works by Chip Ingram.

Broadcast Resource

Additional Resource Mentions

I Choose Love Book
"The Five Love Languages" Book by Gary Chapman

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.
0:14.2	How often do you and your spouse really talk?
0:18.8	How often with your husband or with your wife do you have a heart-to-heart
0:23.9	conversation that you walk away and say, wow, such a deep connection. That was wonderful.
0:30.7	If you want help in having more of that, then stay with me. Most marriages settle for techniques and self-help tools to improve compatibility,
0:41.2	but real transformation happens when you stop living for God's approval and start living from it.
0:47.6	Today on Living on the Edge, Chip Ingram shows how believing your true identity
0:51.8	changes everything about how you love your mate. You're already
0:56.1	chosen, holy, and deeply loved. When that truth sinks into your heart, you'll naturally dress
1:01.8	appropriately, putting on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. It's not about
1:07.8	performing better. It's about understanding who you already are in Christ.
1:12.7	Well, here's Chip Ingram with his message, effectively communicating God's love to your mate.
1:17.6	Our text is Colossus chapter 3, verses 12 through 17.
1:23.6	And it starts out with what we already possess.
1:26.5	So as those who've been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness,
1:34.8	humility, gentleness, and patience.
1:38.3	So putting on a heart of compassion, compassion is empathy to action versus being cynical.
1:45.2	You talk about something that will change your marriage more than any technique or any skill.
1:49.7	You start putting on a heart of compassion.
1:53.6	The second, he says, put on a heart of kindness.
1:56.9	Kindness is whatever is helpful, beneficial, versus being critical.
2:02.6	Third is humility.
	...

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