A Wegmans recently opened in Astroplace here.

Yeah, yeah.

And people are losing their minds.

I don't get it.

Now, at first, I was like, what's the big goddamn deal, you guys?

Relax.

You're me.

It's a grocery store.

We have a million of them here.

Everybody breathe.

And then I went to a Wegmans in Pennsylvania.

Okay.

My very first time at a Weggen's.

Your Virgin Voyage. I lost my fucking mind call.

Why?

I can't really explain it.

I can't.

But this grocery store is magic.

It was like the most beautiful produce I'd ever seen. It was like Hollywood movie produce. Now, I wonder if maybe this feels a little less exciting to me because I grew up more in the country, so I'm used to an enormous super grocery store. So look, I grew up in the suburbs. I'm also used to an enormous, this is not that. This is special. This is special. I'm sorry, Publix in Florida. I'm sorry. You are not Wegmans. Go to the back of the line. Get out of here. Shop right in Hyde Park, New York. You're not Wegmans. Get out of my face. You're trash. Columbus Circle Whole Foods. you can fuck right off.

Oh, oh, okay.

Now we're tossing.

Now we're throwing hands.

...