We're recording from now. Here we go. Here we go. Hello and welcome to Tuesday's edition of Offair with Jane and Fee. It started drizzling this morning in London. It was such a welcome change

from the intense heat of the last couple of weeks. And every single flower in my garden, Jane,

had a droopy head last night. And by 10 o'clock this morning, they were upright on rain parade.

Oh, that's lovely. I planted a sunflower seed. I planted several. Nothing happened at all. And then one began to look really promising and actually just collapsed in the heat. So I'm sunflowerless now. Is it too late to start again? Probably is, isn't it? Oh, I think sunflowers are undoubtedly doubty. I think you can just bung one in and see what happens. I'll get some more seeds. Anyway, the leaf blowers coming today. Good luck neighbours. Good luck neighbours. I touch so loudly when I see. Yeah, they can't hear you. People with the leaf blowers. No, they can't at all. And it's like the people who are shouting very, very loudly these days into the ether as they have a conversation

with the ether because they've got earbuds in. So they storm down the road and where is the

microphone when you've got earbuds in? That's a really good question. I don't know. I don't know.

But you're right. The trouble is with eavesdropping in all my life and I've lived now a very long time, I've yet to actually eavesdrop on a really interesting phone conversation.

Oh, Jane. Well, there were two over the weekend. Oh, well, you're lucky.

There were two over the weekend, which were just mind-boggling. One poor girl was having a row with a boyfriend who had left her in the worst of circumstances.

And she was absolutely bereft.

It was about 10 past 8 in the morning.

She was, she obviously needed to get out of the house

and she was striding across London fields

and hearing only one half of the conversation,

I did want to intervene, have a word with the young man

and say, just do the decent thing.

Just sort that one out and then move on. Don't move on before you've sorted this one out that's not fair and i did give her a look which i hoped uh conveyed the if you want to stop and have a chat about this i'm absolutely here for you or if you just want to hug i'm here for you or if you'd like me to have a word

with that little bloody tow rack I'm here for you but of course you know nothing really

conveys that so we marched on but then the most extraordinary one James this guy sitting on a bench

talking to somebody I don't whether I'll be able to say this but he was saying to the other person

so it wasn't full sexual intercourse.

It was just masturbation.

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