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Pillow Talks

E217: Got the Ick? Why It Happens in Relationships + What to Do About It

Pillow Talks

Vanessa & Xander Marin

Health & Fitness, Sexuality

4.82.2K Ratings

🗓️ 17 July 2025

⏱️ 63 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You love your person… but lately… the sound of them chewing is making you cringe. You’ve got the ICK. So what do you do? And what does it actually mean?! This week, we’re breaking it all down for you plus what to do when your partner’s quirky habits suddenly feel like a total turnoff. 🤮 We’re also sharing your ick stories — from when baby talk stops being not cute to when dirty texts majorly backfire. Whether you’re currently dry heaving on the inside… or worrying that you’re the one giving them the ick… this episode is full of perspective, permission, and practical advice. 💛 Here’s what we’re covering: The real definition of an ick (and how it’s different from a red flag) What to do when your partner’s behavior starts killing your attraction The most common icks (bad breath, loud chewing, weird toenail habits…) Your funniest icks from Instagram (you did NOT hold back) 🎧 And don’t worry—we’ve got even more ick stories and questions coming next week in Part 2. 🔗 Links & Resources: EPISODE 46: The Hygiene Episode ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode46 EPISODE 198: Stop Doing THIS If You Want More Sex ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode198 ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Let’s be honest, everyone has an ick or two. But if you’re feeling more disconnected, more irritable, or less turned on than you’d like… it might be time to reconnect in a more intentional way. Inside our monthly membership Deeper, we help you explore what really turns you on —mentally, emotionally, and physically. You’ll get access to our member library of courses and guides , plus live calls, date night ideas, and support from a like-minded community. Because when you’re truly connected… the little things don’t ick you out as much. 👉 Join Deeper today. Because intimacy is the whole point. https://vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected: 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ================================= Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

When he high fives everyone around him when his team scores.

0:05.0

I mean, simple solution, stop going to public places to watch sports games.

0:11.0

I'm just kidding.

0:12.0

The face he makes when he cleans his ear with a Q-tip.

0:16.0

I mean, I think it might be time, bro, to just start doing that private.

0:20.0

Squeezing, this one was insane. Squeezing condiments into his head. I think it might be time bro to just start doing that in private.

0:22.8

Squeezing, this one was insane.

0:27.9

Squeezing condiments into his mouth instead of on a plate and then dipping.

0:29.4

Who does this?

0:30.0

I would.

0:34.5

Like you have a fry, you put like a fry in your mouth and then just like a ketchup bottle?

0:35.3

I don't understand.

0:36.0

I would.

0:36.8

Oh my God.

0:45.9

Hello and welcome to the Pillow Talks podcast.

0:47.5

We're your host, Vanessa.

0:48.7

And Zander Marin.

0:51.7

I'm a sex therapist with over 20 years of experience.

0:53.3

And I'm just a regular dude.

0:55.7

We share the ups and downs in our relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques

0:57.8

for improving yours.

0:59.4

Make sure you subscribe for your weekly double date

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