E110 A Pretty Little Monster and a Planetary Enzyme

And That's Why We Drink

Christine Schiefer, Em Schulz | Para Pods

True Crime, Society & Culture, Comedy

4.7 • 24.1K Ratings

🗓️ 10 March 2019

⏱️ 81 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Calling all cool teens! Stop snagging and necking and tune into our horniest episode ever! In episode 110 Em covers the Goatman(person?) of Maryland. It’s unclear whether he’s a genetic experiment gone wrong, a hairy old introvert, or simply an urban legend. What we do know, however, is that he’s 100% axe. But that’s not all! Em gives us a bonus story this week - the Pope Lick Monster! Or as we like to call him, the Pretty Little Monster. Meanwhile, Christine covers the story of Ira Einhorn, who considers himself Philadelphia’s very own planetary enzyme. However, we know him as a hypocritical, predatory murderer who did NOT invent Earth Day and also smells like a hoagie with onions. Moral of the story: contrary to popular belief, the world could use a little less hugging. And that’s why we drink! Please consider supporting the companies that support us! Get 15% off and free shipping on your first MeUndies purchase! Go to meundies.com/drink Get 10% off your first order AND free shipping when you use promo code DRINK at Brooklinen.com. Get a special offer from Stamps.com that includes a 4-week trial, free postage and a digital scale! Go to stamps.com, click on the microphone and enter code DRINK Visit ritual.com/DRINK to start your ritual today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Let me be straight with you. This is a radio commercial for three small business insurance.
0:04.4	The policy has no fine print. It's clear what's covered.
0:07.2	So while you can't see the following scene, just know that this pet store is protected by three.
0:11.8	Joe, did you leave the snake tank open?
0:13.7	Look, I don't want to point fingers, but yes.
0:15.6	It's quite a big size, sir. I'm calling my lawyer.
0:18.8	They're going to need some help with this mess. Luckily, they have three.
0:21.8	No fine print, just exceptional coverage.
0:24.0	Three is a product of Berkshire Hathaway Direct Insurance Company.
0:27.5	Three, no nonsense, just common sense.
0:30.2	Hey guys, we're about to get into the episode, but there is one announcement that I completely
0:35.3	forgot to bring up in our intro. And that is that we have a new merch site.
0:40.1	And we have a lot of new fun stuff, different designs, different styles,
0:45.2	much more of a variety on products. We have a tie-dye shirt. We have a dog bandana,
0:50.0	so that should tell you everything you need to know. Mugs, water bottles, sweatshirts,
0:54.6	everything, you name it. So if you guys want to check that out for the next 12 days,
0:59.2	you can get 15% off the shop. And that should automatically apply when you go to the site.
1:05.0	So go to bit.ly slash and that's why we drink merch all lowercase.
1:09.6	That's bit.ly slash and that's why we drink merch.
1:13.0	Thanks guys, we hope you like what you see.
1:25.6	Hello. Happy birthday.
1:27.2	Oh, two, Eva. That's beautiful.
	...

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