Dr. Becky Kennedy: #1 Parenting Mistake Fueling Your Kid’s Anxiety! Follow THIS Proven Framework to Raise Emotionally Strong Adults
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
iHeartPodcasts
4.8 • 28.5K Ratings
🗓️ 11 August 2025
⏱️ 119 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
What’s the hardest part of parenting for you?
Do you think kids today are more anxious than before?
Today, Jay sits down with Dr. Becky Kennedy, clinical psychologist, best-selling author, and founder of Good Inside, a global parenting and mental health platform. Named the “Millennial Parent Whisperer” by Time, Dr. Becky is known for her compassionate, practical approach to raising emotionally healthy children while maintaining strong, sturdy leadership as a parent.
In this eye-opening conversation, Jay and Dr. Becky explore why modern parenting often swings between dismissing children’s emotions and letting them call the shots, sharing practical ways to find the balance in between. Dr. Becky shares why parenting is a skill you can actually learn, the surprising power of repairing after conflict, and how boundaries and validation work together to help kids feel safe, understood, and supported.
Dr. Becky shares how to shift your mindset from “my kid is giving me a hard time” to “my kid is having a hard time,” creating a more compassionate approach to conflict and connection. She explains why constantly optimizing for happiness for your kids can actually create anxiety later in life, why letting kids struggle is key to building resilience, and how to release the heavy burden of “mom guilt” by recognizing which emotions are yours to carry and which belong to your child.
In this interview, you’ll learn:
How to Repair After Rupture and Strengthen Connection
How to Set Boundaries Without Power Struggles
How to Validate Feelings Without Over-Coddling
How to Build Capable and Resilient Kids
Why Not All “Mom Guilt” is Actually Guilt
How to Balance Empathy with Leadership as a Parent
Parenting isn’t about getting it perfect. It’s about showing up, repairing when things go wrong, and modeling the emotional skills you want your children to have. As Dr. Becky reminds us, the most powerful thing you can give your kids is the confidence to face life’s challenges knowing they are both safe and valid.
With Love and Gratitude,
Jay Shetty
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What We Discuss:
00:00 Intro
02:49 Should Kids Dictate Parenting Styles?
06:03 Building Tolerance As A Skill
10:43 How To Overcome Mom Guilt
18:27 Becoming a Mom Shouldn't Be Endured Alone
21:50 What is the Best Parenting Strategy?
29:30 The First Step Of Repair
34:18 How to Reconcile with Your Kid
36:54 How to Reconcile with Your Kid
39:17 Your Kid is Just Having a Hard Time
42:04 The Myth Of Always Being Available
44:30 How Do You Set a True Boundary?
48:36 The Communication Skills Every Parent Needs
52:34 What is Your Job As A Parent?
56:48 Your Kid’s Feelings Are Valid
59:12 How Boundaries & Validation Make for Resilient Adults
01:00:40 Should you be Optimizing for Happiness In Childhood?
01:09:45 The Power of Patience & Time
01:12:56 Teaching Kids How To Build Tolerance
01:19:44 Fostering Independence
01:24:36 Teaching Children Self-Reliance
01:30:33 The Value Of Discipline
01:37:56 The Pressure Parents Experience
01:41:52 Independence Vs Dependence
01:50:46 The Fear Of Patterns Repeating
Episode Resources:
Dr. Becky Kennedy | Website
Dr. Becky Kennedy | Instagram
Dr. Becky Kennedy | Facebook
Dr. Becky Kennedy | YouTube
Dr. Becky Kennedy | LinkedIn
Dr. Becky Kennedy | X
Dr. Becky Kennedy | TikTok
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | This is an IHeart podcast. |
| 0:04.0 | We've gone from not caring about kids emotions to being scared of kids emotions. |
| 0:08.3 | The more you optimize for happiness in childhood, the more you actually wire for anxiety in adulthood. |
| 0:14.5 | Dr. Becky Kennedy, a go-to voice for modern parents. |
| 0:17.7 | Helping parents break cycles and build connections. |
| 0:21.0 | What actually makes a good parent? |
| 0:23.0 | Repair without a doubt is the most important parenting strategy. |
| 0:26.8 | What's the worst thing a parent can say to a child that's going through a difficult time? |
| 0:31.5 | I don't care about your feelings. |
| 0:32.9 | I'm not listening. |
| 0:33.8 | I'm not really connecting. |
| 0:34.9 | I am telling me what to do. |
| 0:36.5 | I'm leading with control. |
| 0:41.3 | Can you be your kid's best friend and still set boundaries? Kids need us to embody our authority. |
| 0:44.3 | Boundaries and validation when paired together, that's what makes for really resilient adults. |
| 0:48.3 | What's the cost of being a good kid who never caused problem? |
| 0:53.3 | You can't learn to manage emotions. You feel like you're not allowed to have. |
| 0:56.0 | If we can't tolerate the challenging feelings our kids have, |
| 1:01.0 | and we look for a quick distraction, |
| 1:03.0 | what they learn is, I'm a kid and I find my feelings overwhelming, |
| 1:07.0 | but oh my goodness, my parent lives. My, it's overwhelming. |
| 1:12.1 | You've said it's not your job to make your kids happy. |
... |
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