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Plumbing the Death Star

Does Wonka Know How to Run a Business? (Feat. The Weekly Planet)

Plumbing the Death Star

Sanspants Radio

Tv & Film, Comedy

4.81.4K Ratings

🗓️ 2 June 2015

⏱️ 36 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In which our heroes gorge themselves on chocolate, press all the buttons in the Wonka-vator, get PTSD from the Boat Tunnel and are handed the keys to a chocolate factory, all while wondering if Willy Wonka knows how to run a business. We look at the nefarious secret life of Mr Wonka, the use of slave labour in exchange for cacao beans and try to figure out how to pronounce the word pygmy. Jackson has grave concerns for the health of Charlie Bucket, Mason thinks Willy Wonka is an evil genius who doesn’t understand reality, Duscher has no idea what an Oompa Loompa is and James just wants to defend his controversial decision to read books. It’s a twisted adventure full of booby traps and everlasting gobstoppers as we try to balance the expenses of the factory, but ultimately just get super pissed at Grandpa Joe for lying to everyone about being bedridden. What a crook, a cheat and a swindler. Good day!Want to help us prove that Willy Wonka is in fact a secret Nazi scientist? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in re-writing chocolate-covered history.And don’t forget to get your free audible book download and a 30 day free trial at http://www.audibletrial.com/SanspantsRadio there’s probably at least five books about opening your own factory to distract the general public from ever finding out you were once clearly a Nazi.

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Transcript

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0:00.0

Short clips of this bullshit now on Tik-Tok.

0:03.8

Watch it too much and make us go viral.

0:06.0

Now on, help ruin other people's days.

0:08.6

Just search for plumbing the Death Star on Tik-Tok

0:10.8

and don't forget to like, comment and follow so we can trick that

0:14.1

algorithm into thinking that any of this is good.

0:22.4

This is a passenger announcement. You can now book your train on Uber and get 10% back in credits to spend on Uber.

0:32.0

So you can order your own fries instead of eating everyone else's.

0:36.0

Trains, now on Uber. T's and C's apply, check the Uber app.

0:41.0

Just imagine what your best Christmas ever would sound like.

0:45.0

Thank you for calling National Lottery.

0:46.0

I can see you calling about a winner today, is that correct?

0:49.0

Yeah, I think I have.

0:50.0

I'll just take to double check for I do a cartwheel.

0:52.0

Yeah, I can confirm that you have won the top prize 1.2 million.

0:56.3

Oh my what! Happy Christmas! Why do no?

1:00.0

You have the best Christmas ever.

1:06.0

This Christmas, it could be you. The National Lottery.

1:07.0

Rules and Procedures of Why.

1:09.0

Players must be 18 or over.

1:11.0

Sans Radio. or over. Sanspans Radio, the original Funk's old brother.

1:17.0

Do you want us in your bed?

...

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