DOD276: The Annual Poopy Pants Review
Dear Old Dads
Thomas Smith
4.8 • 550 Ratings
🗓️ 15 May 2026
⏱️ 47 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
It's that time of year: Mother's Day happened last weekend. On a scale of perfectly clean butt to the most poopy of poopy pants, how did the dads do this year? And, in the patron bonus, we get an update on the fire that shut down the entirety of Eli's town!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I'm the cool dad. That's, that's my thing. |
| 0:09.7 | I know now what I can offer you that no one else can. Complete and undependent. |
| 0:16.7 | I'm a man. I'm sensitive. I need to feel loved. I need to be desired. |
| 0:23.1 | Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy. |
| 0:28.4 | Welcome to dear old dads, the podcast that may or may not have poopie pants. We'll find out in a moment. |
| 0:34.7 | I'm Tom Curry. I'm joined as always by Thomas Smith and Eli Bosnick. Hello, gentlemen. Man, that's a way to get rid of a new listener right there. That's done and done. This one's only for the diehards. Feel free to make as many deep cuts as you like because nobody's tuning into this one for the first time. And we already know it's me, so like, whatever. |
| 0:56.5 | Well, we don't. |
| 0:57.2 | So, okay. |
| 0:58.2 | Backstory. |
| 0:59.2 | Backstory. |
| 0:59.8 | So for those of you deep in the lore, which is all of you, because Tom scared away |
| 1:03.1 | all the newbies with poopie pants, last year, Thomas and I were both poopie pants |
| 1:08.6 | were both poopy pants husbands come Mother's Day. |
| 1:10.8 | I think I had a fucking something, some work thing that meant Anna didn't get a break or anything. And then I did like- Go somewhere, like she did a trip or something. Right. She went somewhere, but it just wasn't a Mother's Day, Mother's Day, right? A Mother's Day, Mother's Day. And I think we talked about this last year, so I'll try and make it quick. Mother's Day, Mother's Day is where you take all the bad things |
| 1:31.4 | about being a mom, all of them, and you make them go away for one 12-hour period. Just one 12-hour period. |
| 1:39.9 | Take all the hard work, all the emotional labor, and it all goes away. She gets to lie in bed on her phone, which is what she wants. |
| 1:47.9 | She wants to lie in bed on her phone and order Uber eats. |
| 1:51.4 | These are her deepest, most private desires. |
| 1:56.1 | And you can make those things habit. |
| 1:57.8 | So both Thomas and I failed. |
| 1:59.5 | We failed on the present game. |
| 2:01.6 | Spoiler alert, |
... |
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