I'm the cool dad. That's, that's my thing.

I know now what I can offer you that no one else can. Complete and undependent.

I'm a man. I'm sensitive. I need to feel loved. I need to be desired.

Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy.

Welcome to dear old dads, the podcast that's recording at 9 a.m. California time. We have probably our sleepiest bear, Thomas, joining us today as well as

Eli Bosnick. Hello, gentlemen. Hello, Tom. However, the problem with introducing this,

like this is especially early, is that when we recorded our usual time, Thomas answers the phone

as though we medically woke him up from some

kind of surgery slash coma. Oh yeah. So there's no actual difference between recording at

6 a.m. California time and recording at 5 p.m. in the evening. Thomas will still get on the line.

Like he has the giant cartoon beard and is about to explore the town and find out.

If we're quoted around 11, then that's the time when I start being alive.

I want to say this for my whole heart to see.

Thank you, Tom.

I don't believe you.

No.

I do not believe you.

No.

Well, relative to me, I'm not saying I turn into a whole different person, but. But gentlemen, do you know the only thing worse than the sleep denial? Well, hold on. I want to hear about the experimentation that your wives have done with you. Ooh. Oh, yes. Yeah. Yeah, we got to talk. We got to talk. So we got to have a little spoon. It's spoon gate. Spoon gate. Yeah. A little spoon talk. So listeners wrote in and thought, I think they were lumping my experience in with Eli's. I'm not anti my wife being the big spoon. I'm fine with that. It's just wildly impractical. It was actually so

impractical. Like, Haley and I were like laughing and she's like, well, let me try being the big spoon.

So I'm fairly broad of shoulder and my wife is fairly slender of everything. And so like,

I laid on my side and she curled up behind me and then in order for her to put her arm over my shoulder. Then you didn't know she was in the room. Yeah. She's like, okay, all right, I'm in position. I'm like, oh, this is actually quite nice. Like, it feels good. And she's like, okay, slither out and I wanted you to see my position. so like as best as moving, I, like, kind of slithered out and ducked under and kind of, you know, wiggled my way and I turned around, and I almost wish I'd taken a picture. Because she was at this crazy fucking angle propping herself up on her elbow. Of course. Yeah. It was absurd. Balancing on seven yoga blocks to throw an arm over.

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