I'm the cool dad. That's, that's my thing.

I know what I can offer you that no one else can. Complete and undependent.

I'm a man. I'm sensitive. I need to feel loved. I need to be desired.

Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy.

Welcome to dear old dads, the podcast that's all touched out. I'm Tom Curry. I'm joined as always by Thomas Smith and Eli Bosnick. Hello, gentlemen.

I don't know how to respond to it. What do we do? Just getting all up in his bits. Get in here, buddy. Get in his grill. Get in here. Getting some snuck. Are you a big spoon or a little spoon, Tom? You strike me as a big spoon. I'm the big spoon. Yeah, I've never been a little spoon. Are you guys only one type of spoon? what a sad existence. Oh, no, you got to be one type of spoon. Yeah. I would never.

No. I'm the big spoon, yeah. I've never been a little spoon. Are you guys only one type of spoon? What a sad existence.

Oh, no, you got to be one type of spoon. I would never. No. I can't imagine being little spoon.

I'm heartbroken at the use of this. I would take away your rights if you were a little spoon.

This may come from physical discomfort literally all the time. I can't be in one position for more than four seconds because everything hurts. So I'm constantly flipping spoons. That's insane to me. You're telling me your wife doesn't come up behind you. Give you a little neck, anything. Give you a little... To say I would judo throw her is an understatement. In bed? Like a cuddles? You wouldn't snuggle with your wife as Little Spoon? Nope. What the fuck is wrong with you homophobes? Yeah, maybe this is like... Maybe I found the last remnant of my upstate New York upbringing's homophobia. I did not anticipate this being an issue. I really did it. This might be gay fear. You're not actually allowed as a man to be the little spoon in the Midwest. Like you can't do it. No, the cops come break down your door. Yeah, it's the whole... It would just never occur to me to not be the one that's the big spoon. That's not how... Constantly the one one that's the default. But like, you're never in the other...

Like, you're never just happened to be lying down toward the other direction? No. If I'm lying and I'm facing the other direction, it's because I'm now asleep. I've fallen asleep. No. Okay. You can't be spooned in your sleep? Is that not... If it happens, I don't know what's happening.

I'm fucking asleep.

I have no idea.

If you spoon me in my sleep, I'm not just awake now.

I'm out asleep. I have no idea. If you spoon me in my sleep, I'm not just awake now.

I'm out of the building. I've actually jumped clear through the window. What is happening right now? I wouldn't mind. I guess I wouldn't mind. It just, it's not, I don't know. It would be insane. It wouldn't be like, I got to get up and move.

It's just not our dynamic.

Can I be clear what spooning is?

Because maybe we're picturing different things. Maybe, something's wrong here. I don't know what's happening. I mean, just a little snuggle. Just a little. Because I love snuggles. I love snuggles. And I love snuggles and I love snuggles in a variety of positions. But to be the definition of Little Spoon is someone is on their side or on their back.

Both people, really.

And is being, is. but to be the definition of little spoon is someone is on their side or on their back.

Both people, really.

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